WHAT GOES ON TOUR… [ ]

JULIAN WHITE is the funniest man I ever played with, to the point where, during England sessions, we’d be separated during the meetings, writesDavidFlatman.

Defence coach Phil Larder did a presentation once and at the end of it he turned to the players and said, “Thanks, lads. My work here is done.” Then sat down.

I’m not sure if Phil was aware that he’d just pinched a quote from ThePrisonerofZenda, but regardless, it sounded quite funny. As soon as he sat down Julian shot me a quick look as if to say, ‘What the f***ing hell was that?’. Unfortunately I started guffawing.

One of the reasons he always had that effect on me is because Julian’s natural expression is a mixture of lugubrious and dour, which are perfect for comedy.

Just then Andy Robinson stood up. He’s another character, I love Robbo. Anyway, Andy stood up and in full-on David Brent mode he pointed at Phil and said, “That man…” – pause for effect – pause for even longer – “Inspirational!”

That was it. I looked at Julian, he looked at me, and we completely folded. We were all sitting behind desks and in an attempt to hide the fact that we were pissing ourselves, we had to pretend that we’d dropped things on the floor.

Not everybody got the joke, of course. I remember Neil Back looking over and shaking his head. By this time Danny Grewcock had started laughing and was doubled up. When Lawrence Dallaglio leaned over to ask him what was going on, he couldn’t speak. He just let out a little whining noise.

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