Ruislip & Eastcote & Northwood Gazette
Hairdresser’s dream – and old Airstream
STYLIST WHO SUFFERED CONVERSION THERAPY HOPES TO ENCOURAGE OTHERS TO BE THEMSELVES
A HAIRSTYLIST who has worked with top A-listers is proudly celebrating his identity as an openly gay man after years of fighting his homosexuality as his strict religious upbringing made him believe it was a sin.
Now happily married to the man of his dreams, Timothy David Haveron, 32, has brushed shoulders with Hollywood A-listers and made some of its biggest stars look fabulous for TV and film roles.
Crediting his talent with “saving his life”, he now works on the hair of famous clients side by side with ordinary folk in an incredible £25,000 1969 Airstream trailer – which he has spent £50,000 kitting out as a state-of-the-art salon in Paddington.
But Timothy, of nearby Ealing, told how the freedom he has found in adult life contrasts sharply with his early years, saying: “At church I was told that God didn’t want me this way. He didn’t want me to be gay, so I went to classes to try and be healed.”
Agreeing to speak out about what he calls the “conversion therapy” he went through as part of his religious teachings, as he wants to help others who may be struggling with their sexuality, Timothy does not want to reveal details of where his ordeal happened or who was involved.
He does confirm that it was nowhere near his current home, adding: “I thought that I would burn in Hell for being gay.” Now proud to be gay and happy to discuss his sexuality, Timothy urges anyone who
receives a negative reaction when they come out to persevere and be true to themselves.
He said: “To anyone struggling, my advice is to just keep looking for that dream. Don’t let your pain turn into hatred. Let it turn into love and patience. By pursuing your dream, you’re allowing yourself to live. It took me many years to learn this, but you can’t let anyone tell you that who you are is not right.”
Recalling his schooldays as a “living hell”, Timothy says he realised he was “different” from the other boys when he was 13 and came out to a couple of friends. But his confidence was betrayed, resulting in relentless bullying.
Timothy said: “I knew I was different from all the other kids and I slowly realised I was gay. I told some people at school when I was 13 and they told everyone, which made my life a living hell. I hated school. I came out to one girl who told all the boys and I received horrible bullying.”
Timothy’s only respite came at weekends, after he found a Saturday job in a salon, where he helped to wash hair. He said: “My school life was a disaster. The salon was the only place I felt free. I would count the days and hours to Saturday. Hairdressing was my saving grace and it gave me a vision for the future.”
Growing up in a religious family, Timothy was always at odds with what he was being told at church – which he attended up to five times a week. Then, in 2014, aged 14, Timothy finally came out to his mum – who he has described as his “best friend”.
But while she had always been a “free spirit” and “tried to understand” as much as she could, they decided to seek help and advice from their church. Timothy said: “It was tough because my family grew up in an environment which was very unaccepting of anything different.
“But my mother was my best friend, so if there was anyone I could share my worries and concerns with it was her. She was the most amazing woman and mother on this planet Earth. She was a mother just trying to understand her son. She was a loving mother.”
‘But the church did not accept his homosexuality, according to Timothy. He says he was advised he needed to be “saved from sin” and was told to attend cell groups, where the purpose was to “heal” him. As he became embroiled in a programme of “conversion therapy”, Timothy says he was terrified he would “burn in Hell” for being gay and tried to convince himself he was not.
Attending Bible studies on five days a week, he claims to have been repeatedly told God “did not want me to be this way”.
Timothy said: “The church pulled me in and the people in it thought they could change me. I started joining small groups at church for Bible studies. I told a lady at the church about my feelings and who I was.
“Instantaneously, I was told that ‘God had great plans for me’ and there were wonderful things that could be done through Christ. The religious leaders said I had a ‘demon inside me’ and I had to ‘release it’.”
In 2006, after completing his GCSE exams, Timothy decided to throw himself fully into hairstyling, as it was the only way he could find happiness. But by 2007, then aged 17, fully qualified and working fulltime, Timothy began to concede to his “confused” feelings and went to gay bars after attending church.
He said: “When I was 17, I’d be going to these meetings at church and then to the gay bar straight after. But I was confused, I felt like I would burn in Hell, but I also needed my community where I felt accepted. Every day I had Bible studies. I had gospel meetings. I had prayer meetings. My whole life was fully submerged in church. It was a terrifying time. I wondered why God created me this way.”
Struggling to cope with life in the UK, he moved to Australia in September 2009 to escape, while pursuing his career. Tragically, on April 18, 2010, to add to the heavy blows life had already dealt Timothy, he discovered his mother had been found dead.
He said: “It was the worst pain I had ever felt in my life. My heart felt like it had been ripped from my chest. My life didn’t feel worth living. I felt so scared and so alone. I felt like I had lost everything in that moment, and everything was torn from me.”
Returning to the UK, lost in grief, Timothy again found solace in his work. And, in late 2010, he had his big break when he started working on a popular HBO TV show filming in Belfast as well as being employed on other shows for the BBC.
Timothy has brushed shoulders with Hollywood A listers and made some of its biggest stars look amazing for their TV and film roles
Also, his mother’s death finally gave Timothy the strength he needed to break away from the church and start to openly date men – moving to London in September 2012 and establishing himself as a hairstylist in the bustling capital.
He said: “After my mum died, religion lost its hold on me and I started to go on gay dates f. I moved to London after falling for a man, but he dumped me. Still, it was a positive time in my life, because I started working with people in the media, with musicians and on TV shows.”
Timothy met his now husband in 2013 and, attracted by his intelligence, he quickly fell in love. But, after dating for a year, a “close friend” told him he should speak to the church and forbade him from dating another man.
After intense indoctrination in his teens, Timothy found himself once more fearing “the wrath of God” if he pursued homosexuality.
He said: “I met my husband online in 2013. We went to a Persian restaurant and he spoke French, Italian and Arabic. I knew he was the man I was going to fall in love with.
“He was so intelligent and he made me feel a way I’d never felt before. I felt really special. But someone I really looked up to told me I could not date him and I had to go through conversion therapy again.”
Timothy and his future husband remained friends, but for one year he denied being gay out of fear of “burning in hell” and started returning to church.
Then, in 2014, while on a trip in California, something changed.
He said: “I had been telling people I wasn’t gay anymore, as I didn’t want to give the Devil power. But, we were on a trip in America and my husband told me he’d never stopped loving me and that changed everything.”
Timothy’s trailer in Paddington where famous and ordinary folk can get ‘glammed up’ side by side
It was the first time Timothy had felt truly loved since losing his mum and he finally felt ready to let the church go once and for all. Tying the knot on the beach in California, in 2016, he and his husband have been happily married ever since.
Between 2016 and 2020 Timothy – finally feeling confident about who he really was – worked on TV shows and films and became a trusted hairstylist for many celebrities. In April 2020, he decided to buy a £25K 1969 Airstream trailer – like those he had worked in on filmsets – where he said he had “never felt freer”.
He said: “Hairstyling has saved my life. The minute I pick up a comb or scissors, or paint someone’s hair, I forget every bit of pain, every traumatic feeling. I lose all of it. My freest moments have been while working on film sets, where I’ve felt complete acceptance. I wanted to have that feeling every day – so I bought the 1969 Airstream trailer.”
Spending more than £50k on refurbishing the trailer to exacting specifications, so it includes two styling chairs, a sofa, a wine fridge, two mirrors and a TV, it now sits in Paddington “glamming up” clients.
Opening in May 2021, he named the trailer Pauline after his mum and has tended to some famous tresses. Now Timothy hopes his happiness will inspire other people struggling to accept who they are, adding: “I want young people to know they can thrive, have a career and turn their lives around by accepting their sexuality and pursuing their dreams.”