TALKING POINT A woman on a mission
Shelli Gordon is running the spectacular but hellish Spine Race to encourage greater openness around mental health after the sudden death of her partner
THE SPINE RACE IS AN ULTRAMARATHON
that, in Britain at least, is beyond compare. Following the 268-mile Pennine Way National Trail from Edale in Derbyshire to Kirk Yetholm in Scotland, it’s a course of mountains, moorland, valleys and waterfalls that is spectacular and gruelling in equal measure. And it takes place in January. That’s the task facing North Yorkshire ultrarunner Shelli Gordon, who’s raising money for Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM) after her partner, Tony Holland, took his own life last year.
Prior to that day in July, there was nothing to suggest Tony felt depressed, stressed or even remotely unhappy. ‘I’ve got a psychology degree and have been a police officer for nearly 16 years, but there were no signs,’ says Shelli.
COMMUNITY CARE
A year earlier, in the spring of 2017, Shelli and Tony had opened their shop, Lets Run (lets-run.co.uk), in the market town of Stokesley, North Yorkshire, and the business was doing well. ‘It was about trying to build a community and get people running,’ explains Shelli. ‘We didn’t just want a place to sell shoes; we wanted to create somewhere people could come for help and advice.’
An experienced, highly knowledgeable runner, Tony was a member of the North York Moors Athletic Club (NYMAC). ‘When we weren’t working, we were running,’ says Shelli. In 2012, Tony won the 25-mile Kielder Challenge; in 2013 he broke the British 12-hour treadmill record (65.4 miles) and in 2017 he finished second in the Clennell Ultra. Running aside, he was ‘chatty and lively’ says Shelli and the comments on NYMAC’S Justgiving page echo that sentiment: ‘You couldn’t wish to meet a friendlier person’, ‘What a lovely fella’, ‘A lovely bloke’.
‘I want to do something to help remove the stigma around male suicide [the biggest killer of men under 45 in the UK] and also raise valuable money for CALM,’ says Shelli. ‘I want to get people talking. The more money that’s raised, the more the charity can do, but it’s not only about that for me: I want people to speak to each other and support each other. Because The Spine is such a big race – and there’s a tracker so you can see where people are – hopefully that will bring a community together and encourage people to talk.’
COMFORT IN NORMALITY
Though grief-stricken, Shelli has found comfort in the past few months in the business she and Tony set up together. ‘I [re-]opened the shop the day after he died,’ she says. ‘It seems crazy now, but I think I needed that normality – to keep busy. A lot of the time people will be isolated from anyone but very close family and friends in these situations, but because I was running the shop it got everyone to speak about it.
‘The business has helped massively, because I feel like I want to help other people, whether it’s a running journey they’re going on, or a more personal experience. I can’t guarantee that I will be able to help, but I am here to talk to – even if it’s just a whinge and a rant and to say how shit things are at the moment – and that’s helped give me something to focus on. They know I’ll understand, because I’ve been there.’
While the shop is still in its relative infancy, running has been a huge part of Shelli’s life since she was 11, and her CV is impressive: in 2014 she set a female course record in the Hardmoors 160 and finished 17th woman in the UTMB; in 2015 she returned to the Hardmoors 160 to finish first overall; she finished first woman and second overall in the 2016 Pathfinder 15; and in 2017 Shelli broke the female course record at the High Fells of Hedgehope Half Marathon. However, for all her immense experience and running accomplishments, she freely acknowledges that The Spine is in ‘a different league’ to anything she’s done before.
‘There are a lot of unknowns,’ says Shelli. ‘I’ve never run this far before, never run much of the route before and never really used a GPS before.’ Add to that the 13,135m of ascent and the fact the temperature dropped to -18C at last year’s event, and the enormity of the challenge – with its 168-hour (seven-day) time limit and less than 50 per cent completion rate – becomes clear.
An ultramarathon is one thing, but the true test will be in fostering a culture of openness around mental health. ‘Even if just one person says, “Have you seen that Shelli’s running The Spine?” and that leads to a conversation about Tony, or mental health in general, it will be worthwhile.’