Need a job, Nige?

PETER STRINGFELLOW, owner of the eponymous London lapdancing club, is sitting out the election in a G-string on hi s yacht in Mallorca.

A long-time Tory supporter, he reveals that Nigel Farage tried to woo him to Ukip. ‘I declined, but I like Nigel a lot. I hope he wins his seat because if he doesn’t, he says he will quit.

‘He will be a loss to British politics.’

Perhaps i f Nige does fail, Stringy can find a job for him at his nightspot clamping down on who’s allowed in: he could introduce a points-based system l i ke t he one he wants to s ee at Britain’s borders . . .