We must grieve for lost pets

MY FIRST reply today begins with the awareness that inevitably readers will think they’ve read a problem before. Human sorrows go round and round and round. So I make no apology for returning to another one here — spurred by a sad email from Ann M.

She writes: ‘In the past, you’ve written about the sadness of l osing your beloved dog — and in the grand scheme of things I realise there are many more pressing and excruciating issues out there.

‘But please let me get it off my chest. My beloved little doggie Holly, a miniature schnauzer, died just over three weeks ago.

‘She was 15 with many ailments. In the end I had to let her go — and my partner says I did the right thing.

‘But I’m so full of grief and miss her so much. I think I’m getting over her, then tears come. I have her ashes at home and will make a memory box for her bits and pieces — I can’t get rid of everything as though she never existed. But I still hurt.

‘I’m sorry if I’ve churned up the grief you felt when you lost your beloved dog.’

It’s so touching that in the midst of loss Ann still thinks of me. But I’m happy to let her know that she has misunderstood: our beloved Maltese Bonnie is still very much with us, although at 13 she is (rather like her human companion) somewhat slowing up.

But yes, I often think about what it will be like when we lose her and can make myself cry at the thought.

People with no pets won’t comprehend any of this; the rest will agree when I assure Ann that ‘in the grand scheme of things’ this love — and grief — matters, too.

Adored animals are a vital part of our families and deserve to be mourned. So Ann, treasure your memories. But perhaps one day you’ll consider giving another dog, one of the many rejected ones, a home.

I really hope so — because then you’d be practising all the love and care Holly taught you.