False modesty from Mirren

HELEN MIRREN claims in an interview that she ‘doesn’t give a damn about looking good’.

oh, please! this from a woman paid a fortune to promote L’oreal’s age-defying products and who seldom has so much as a hair out of place on the red carpet.

You’re a great role model for later-life beauty, Helen, but please don’t insult us by claiming you don’t care. Madonna is charging fans up to £450 to watch her poledance atop a crucifix while she stomps on a bikini- clad nun as part of her latest tour. I realise she’s running out of ways to shock, but doesn’t this sick stunt smack of rank desperation? Besides, if she’s that eager for attention, how about pole- dancing in a burkha while stomping on a bikini- clad imam? no, thought not. On the day our beloved Queen became Britain’s longest serving monarch, the anti-monarchy group Republic said: ‘When anyone survives for this long it is usually a sign of something wrong.’ What’s truly wrong is to make such a disgusting and insulting remark about any 89-year-old woman, let alone one who has served her nation so well for over 63 years.

AFTER foxtrotting off with Strictly Come Dancing siren Kristina Rihanoff, former rugby star Ben Cohen has moved back in with his wife and daughters. Apparently, he’s short of money and they haven’t managed to sell the family home. Hmmm. What are the odds Ben does a ‘Paul Hollywood’ — another fool who ran home after finding his sexy young lover too hot to handle?

WITH the X Factor losing out to Strictly in the ratings war, its new co-presenter Caroline Flack ‘accidentally’ took a selfie showing off her new hairstyle . . . and right nipple. At least it’s a welcome distraction from Simon Cowell’s manboobs.