YOU CAN QUOTE ME ON THAT

‘I’M GETTING more unruffled as the years go by. I’m definitely not going down the Victor Meldrew route, route, turning turning into into a a grim grim old curmudgeon.’

Ageing heart-throb Nigel Havers

‘NEVER! Never ever ever. It’s not my cup of tea really, besides which it’s not real.’

Dame Joan Collins on doing doing reality reality TV TV shows shows

‘I WILL leave the Labour Party when I am taken off this Earth in my coffin.’

Lord Mandelson

‘THERE’S ‘THERE’S nothing nothing worse worse than writing for critics — or prizes, even worse. The only thing Nick and me ever talk about is how crap everyone else is.’

Novelist Robert Harris on on the the high high opinion opinion he has of himself and his brother-in-law, writer Nick Hornby

‘OH, NO, darling, I’m too old to be racy.’

Jane Asher, 69, asked if she is doing any sex scenes in a new TV drama

‘I ‘I DIDN’T DIDN’T cry cry watching watching it. The only person who should be crying is the person who paid for it.’

Sir Alan Sugar puts the boot in to the £7 million John Lewis ad