Satellite choice
MATINEE CLASSIC Operation Petticoat, 11am, Film4
THIS comedy tells the true-ish story (with an embellishment or two) of a beleaguered World War II sub and its yet more beleaguered captain — Cary Grant at his twinkly-eyed best!
SUPERHERO FLICK X-Men: Apocalypse, BT TV Store, Sky Store, Virgin
SUPERHERO blockbuster that’s packed with almost too many characters, plots and grand action sequences. Jennifer Lawrence takes centre stage as the uncomfortable hero Mystique, marshalling the good mutants for the fight.
TIMEWATCH Crime And Punishment. 9pm, BBC4
HOW have justice and policing changed in the past 70 years, and how have BBC documentaries reflected that? This delve into the archives answers both questions to intriguing effect. Another strong documentary follows at 10pm — The Secret History Of Our Streets.
CHILLER THRILLER Frozen, 9pm, Horror
CRAFTILY sustained young-people-in-peril thriller in which three snowboarders are left dangling on a ski lift when the resort closes for the week — the stuff of nightmares for anyone who has ever ventured on to the slopes. Emma Bell is one of the high-and-dry trio who panic as night sets in, frostbite blooms, and wolves howl!
FREEVIEW COMEDY 8 Out Of 10 Cats, 10pm, More4
THE panel show moves from Ch4 to More4 for its new, 19th series. Jimmy Carr remains as host (along with his inimitable laugh), but there are two new team captains: live-wire Rob Beckett and unpredictable Aisling Bea (pictured). Both are comedians, and both have been on the show enough times to make this feel like familiar ground.
IT’S A GAS Dave Gorman: Modern Life Is Goodish, 10pm, Dave
THE comic’s half-angry ramble at life’s frustrations returns for a new run, and his first target is the phrase ‘guilty pleasures’. Why do these always involve watching daytime TV or listening to pop music, and never involve any actual guilt? It’s fun watching him getting all worked up.
MODERN DRAMA Divorce, 10.10pm, Sky Atlantic
SO, mediation, then — so much for that. In part five, Robert and Frances are talking to lawyers, who talk back in very warm, reassuring terms about getting them financial security and even happiness. Happiness! Rarely has it been said that lawyers are the key to that . . .
COMEDY CRACKER The Other Guys, 11pm, 5Star
GOOFY king of comedy Will Ferrell joins forces with action beefcake Mark Wahlberg for this silly spoof, which rides gloriously roughshod over all the cliches of the buddy-cop caper. A fast, daft and thoroughly enjoyable romp, this comedy should keep fans of both stars jolly well amused.
SUPERNATURAL DRAMA The Vampire Diaries, 12midnight, ITV2
THE smooth supernatural drama is shunted to a graveyard slot for the first episode of its eighth and final season. As we begin, vampires Damon and Enzo are on a killing spree, but who or what is controlling them? All is revealed in a neatly selfreferential season opener.