Hammy Houdini . . .

FIDGET the hamster from Wakefield has made headlines for his escapology skills, having given his new owner, 11-year-old seren Palmer, the slip ten times in just five weeks in spectacular style — jumping from the floor above into the kitchen through a hole in the ceiling.

As a veteran owner of hamsters, I’d say Fidget’s disappearing act is standard stuff. The more I get to know these critters, the more I wonder why we have them as pets at all.

They run away. They bite. And, most problematic of all, they are nocturnal. Just as you’re getting the kids off to sleep, they spring into life, whirling like dervishes on their wheels, making a right old racket.

Because it’s the only place we can’t hear it, we have our rodent running around in the kitchen. We should save the bills on rentokil — and keep mice instead.