KEZ HAS MADE A GHASTLY JUNGLE MISTAKE
THERE’S a telephone number on Kezia Dugdale’s back in the I’m a Celebrity jungle – and it’s important Scottish viewers understand what it’s for.
This is not the number people should ring if they want to speak to their MSP about a problem with potholes on their street, say, or the infrequent bin collections.
There’s a different number for that and, I have to be honest, it won’t get you through to your elected representative any time soon.
Miss Dugdale isn’t exactly taking calls from people dialling the number on her back either. No, this is the number to call to keep her in the jungle and get her to do icky things.
Yesterday, it was rummaging through a tank of fish guts. Tomorrow, it might be getting into a coffin with rats or snakes.
It is surely only a matter of time before the former Scottish Labour leader has to eat cockroaches or marsupials’ appendages. Tasks like this are firm favourites with fans – and politicians are preferred victims. All of which may leave the taxpayer ringing up to speak to Kez – who also pays her salary, actually – feeling curious as to what she is doing in the Oz Outback earning a five-figure fee while her MSP colleagues are at work.
Fortunately, it turns out she recorded a going away message for them. She says she’s doing it to spread the word about Labour values.
Really? Between mouthfuls of mealworms? That explanation is beyond deluded.
It is a ghastly programme and an even ghastlier mistake.