THE DASTARDLY MR DEEDES

Santander are in a rum spot after chief executive Nathan Bostock was revealed to have been responsible for Royal Bank of Scotland’s Global Restructuring Group, the notorious unit accused of sending small businesses to the wall. Whether £4.5m-ayear Bostock, 57, gets the chop is now up to his hot-breathed chairman, Shriti Vadera, 55, though I’d pay good money to sit in on their discussions. As Gordon Brown’s Treasury Minister, Shriti the Shriek’s volcanic outbursts could be heard whistling all the way down Whitehall. Lloyds is Britain’s best banking employer for lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans (LGBT) staff, according to survey by charity Stonewall. A feather in the cap for sure for Lloyds’ caring, sharing chief Antonio Horta-Osorio, 54, who’s expressed commitment to promoting diversity in his workforce. Nowt L, G, B or T about frisky Antonio, of course! The wizard returns! Aussie hedge funder Greg Coffey, aka the Wizard of Oz, is revealed to have leased 3,000 square feet of office space on Sloane Street which all but confirms rumours he’s launching a new fund. Draculian Coffey, 46, who lurks between London and a 12,000-acre estate on the Hebri- dean island of Jura, retired in 2012 at just 41 with a £450m fortune. Evidently his expressed desire to relax and spend time with his family wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. Oil man Algy Cluff next month releases Unsung Heroes, a self-published collection of vignettes on his favourite business dignitaries. Subjects include ex BA chairman Lord King and recently deceased bon viveur David Tang. Cluff, 77, is hosting a launch at The Travellers Club which, to the dismay of wife Blondel, is one of nine St James’s establishments to which he is a member. Knightsbridge Recruitment seek a £60,000-a-year executive assistant for the head of what they call a ‘leading and dynamic company.’ Who this towering titan of industry is, they don’t say, though the advert does disclose he is ‘charming’ and ‘super friendly’, so those unsmiling tycoons Sir Philip Green and Lord Sugar are safely out of the running.