LITTLE JOHN

MINISTERS may be basking in the reflective glory of our involvement in the Syria attacks. But this campaign has also served to highlight the incompetent neglect of our armed forces by successive governments over decades.

When I wrote last week that we might as well turn our two new aircraft carriers into floating maternity wards, seeing as we didn’t have any planes to fly from them, it was meant partly as a joke.

Now it turns out that Britain’s role at the weekend was minimal, because we simply don’t have the kit.

The £1billion destroyer HMS Duncan can’t fire cruise missiles because plans to equip it with a launcher were scrapped to save money. Our RAF Typhoons can’t fire cruise missiles, either, for the same reason. Those missiles we did lob at Syria came from four Tornado jets, which are due to be retired soon after 40 years service. They date back to before the Falklands war. It’s as if we had to retake the Falklands using Hurricanes and Spitfires from World War II. Curiously, a couple of weeks ago, I watched a documentary about the last two Lancaster bombers still flying. I’m surprised they weren’t pressed into action over Syria.

Given the parsimonious level of defence spending, it can only be a matter of time before Henry VIII’s flagship, the Mary Rose, sets sail again. She last saw service against the French in the early 16th century.

I wonder what ’Enery the Eighth would have made of the news that our modern armed forces are now playing second fiddle to our better-equipped allies, the Cheese-Eating Surrender Monkeys.

Makes you proud to be British.