Fringe one-liners that were comedy gold

1. ‘Working at the Jobcentre has to be a tense job – knowing that if you get fired, you still have to come in the next day’ – Adam Rowe

2. ‘I had a job drilling holes for water – it was well boring’ – Leo Kearse

3. ‘I took out a loan to pay for an exorcism. If I don’t pay it back, I’m going to get repossessed’ – Olaf Falafel

4. ‘In my last relationship, I hated being treated like a piece of meat. She was a vegan and refused to touch me’ – Daniel Audritt

5. ‘What do colour blind people do when they are told to eat their greens?’ – Flo and Joan

6. ‘I’ve got a new job collecting all the jumpers left in the park at the weekends, but it’s

not easy. They keep moving the goalposts’ – Darren Walsh

7. ‘Trump said he’d build a wall but he hasn’t even picked up a brick. He’s just another middle-aged man failing on a DIY project’ – Justin Moorhouse

8= ‘I lost a friend after we had an argument about the Tardis. I thought it was a little thing, but it seemed much bigger once we got into it’ – Adele Cliff

8= ‘Why are they calling it Brexit and not The Great British Break Off?’ – Alex Edelman

10. ‘I think love is like central heating. You turn it on before guests arrive and pretend it’s like this all the time’ – Laura Lexx