Not to be sneezed at... M&S won't ditch their ‘sexist’ Man size tissues
MARKS & Spencer is ready to face down a ‘sexism’ storm which has seen Kleenex bin its Mansizebranded tissues.
The store said yesterday it has no plans to stop using the name on its own-brand boxes of tissues.
It came after Kleenex announced it was renaming the tissues ‘Extra Large’ following complaints from customers on social media.
The move was followed by Waitrose deciding to change the name of its Gentleman’s Smoked Chicken Caesar Roll, despite Gentleman’s Relish being an ingredient. Kimberly-Clark, which makes Kleenex, had responded to complaints on Twitter by a mother from Surrey, who complained her four-year-old son had been confused by the Mansize branding.
It said it would change the name in response to a ‘consistent increase of complaints on gender concern’. However, as critics ridiculed the
trend for scrapping long-standing brand names on the basis of a few online complaints, M&S declared: ‘We’re not currently planning on making any changes.’
The moves by Kleenex and Waitrose led to a barrage of wisecracks on social media.
One Twitter user joked that Mothercare would be next on the hitlist, while another tweeted: ‘Have you complained about Mum deodorant not being just for mums?’
THeSe days it’s increasingly difficult to stay ahead of the game. How many times have i written something in jest, only to find real life has beaten me to the punch? For instance, take the column i wrote last December, about the lunatic campaign to erase the word ‘men’ from our vocabulary.
it followed the Army’s decision to adopt gender-free language designed to be more acceptable to women, gays and transsexuals. out went expressions such as ‘mankind’, ‘sportsmanship’ and ‘gentleman’s agreement’. The heart sank.
At the time of writing, i was in the throes of my annual bout of man flu — can you still say that? — and was coughing and sneezing my way through box after box of ‘man Size’ tissues. How long, i asked, would it be before anyone trying to buy a box of man Size tissues would find themselves arrested for hate crime?
it was supposed to be a joke. Not for the first time, i should have known better.
Within hours of the column appearing, i heard from readers pointing out that in several shops, man Size tissues had already disappeared from the shelves.
Jim Humphryes sent me a photo of a box of Tesco own-brand tissues, ‘previously called man Size’ now labelled ‘extra-large’.
‘in your own words, richard,’ Jim wrote, ‘You couldn’t make it Up.’
Fast forward to this week and a letter in the Daily Telegraph, which caught my eye because it was written by an old friend of mine, the novelist Joseph connolly.
NoTiNG that Kleenex man Size, introduced in 1956 as Kleenex for men, had been rebranded extra Large, he suggested: ‘in the light of this righting of a terrible wrong, should it not be demanded of Kleenex that they immediately issue a heartfelt and unreserved apology to women everywhere who will doubtless have suffered unspeakable embarrassment, torment and lasting trauma — quite possibly to the extent of ruining their entire adult lives . . ?’
He’d summed up the absurdity of the decision with characteristic humour. But Jo was soon to discover that anything he could do, Kleenex could do better.
Parent company Kimberly-clark, the world’s largest manufacturer of tissues, quickly put out a statement justifying the name change in response to ‘a consistent increase of complaints on gender concern’.
A spokesman said, presumably with a straight face: ‘Kimberlyclark in no way suggests that being soft and strong is an exclusively masculine trait, nor do we believe that the man Size branding suggests or endorses gender inequality.
‘Nevertheless, as we remain committed to developing the best possible products for our consumers and take any feedback extremely seriously...’ blah, blah, blah. Stop it. How many millions, or billions, of boxes of tissues must Kleenex sell around the world every year?
And how many ‘complaints on gender concern’ has Kimberlyclark received?
my guess is about half a dozen, if that. They may have been subjected to a few hostile tweets sent by a handful of dopey birds with too much time on their hands. or some madwoman who can’t get a boyfriend might have set up a Facebook page, or something.
But, ladies, have you complained to Kleenex? Do you know anyone who has? Precisely. No, what we’re dealing with here is another classic case of corporate cowardice. Giant, global companies all too easily cave in to single-issue headbangers on social media. At least Kleenex didn’t issue the kind of grovelling apology Jo connolly jokingly demanded in his letter.
That’s more than can be said for supermarket chain Waitrose, which couldn’t wait to say sorry to someone who complained about a ‘sexist’ sandwich sold as part of the Heston Blumenthal range.
Amy Lame (the surname rhymes with barmy, not fame) posted a picture of Heston’s Gentleman’s Smoked chicken roll on Twitter with the comment: ‘i never knew sandwiches were gender specific. i’m female, but thankfully Waitrose let me purchase this anyway.’
Difficult to tell whether this was intended to be a joke, too. Amy Lame is described as an ‘AmericanBritish performer, writer, TV and radio presenter, known for her onewoman shows, her performance group Duckie, and LGBT-themed media works’.
Nope, i’ve never heard of her, either. Apparently, in 2016, mayor Sadiq Khan appointed her London’s first ‘Night Tsar’, whatever that is. Sorry, still none the wiser.
Anyway, when it comes to smoked chicken rolls, she knows of which she speaks. Judging by her photos, she’s no stranger to the sandwich counter.
The roll in question is so named because it contains anchovy mayonnaise, similar to Gentleman’s relish, which dates back to 1828. No doubt that particular delicacy is next in the feminazis’ firing line.
EVeN if her tweet was supposed to be funny, it didn’t stop Waitrose cringing. A spokesman said: ‘it’s never our intention to cause offence — we’re not dictating who should eat this sandwich. However, we are planning to change the name of the sandwich soon.’
Why? Just because one person makes a sarcastic remark about it on social media? one, single, solitary person? For heaven’s sake. Where’s it all going to end? Does this spell the kiss of death for Nivea For men, or L’oreal men expert?
more to the point, in our glorious gender-free future, there is now officially a category of individuals called ‘men who menstruate’.
So will shops have to stop labelling sanitary products as ‘feminine hygiene’?
Think i’m kidding? Nothing would surprise me any more. The punchline to my column on the disappearance of man Size tissues wondered how long it would be before supermarkets started selling them in ‘Trans Size’.
When it happens, remember: you read it here first.