Ephraim Hardcastle
PRESIDENT Trump’s tardiness in congratulating Harry and Meghan contrasts with Barack Obama’s effusive praise when Prince George was born in 2013 and Ronald Reagan’s herogram after William appeared in 1982 declaring: ‘Our fondest good wishes, those of the American people, Nancy and myself, to their Royal Highnesses the Prince and Princess of Wales, and to their little son.’ Donald, get tweeting pronto!
NO SIGN yet of a ditty from retiring poet laureate Carol Ann Duffy honouring the new royal baby. The muse deserted her for three Cambridge births, the Queen’s 90th, her becoming the longest reigning monarch in British history, Philip’s 90th, 95th and retirement and Camilla’s and Charles’s seventieths. But she has eulogised the gas meter. Maybe Harry and Meghan have had a narrow escape!
PRINCE Harry’s emotional praise for Meghan is a far cry from his father’s attitude to his birth. According to former butler Paul Burrell Prince Charles informed Diana he was ‘off to the theatre’ (apparently with Camilla) just hours after Harry was born in September 1984. Claims Burrell: ‘He said: “I’m delighted. I now have an heir and a spare... my work is done”.’
HAROLD Pinter’s account of his affair with Joan Bakewell, pictured, chronicled in Betrayal, is accurate apart from the location of their secret love nest in Kentish Town which Joan, clearing the air, now says: ‘It’s (all) true. Except one of the lines is: “We’ll be perfectly safe, whoever goes to Kilburn these days?”.’
TOURING Canada, curmudgeonly entertainer John Cleese, 79, wails: ‘I’m hitting the road again because I still don’t have rosy finances. I’ve done a lot of work for the BBC, which is more or less working for charity. If I had been in Friends, Cheers or Frasier, I wouldn’t have these problems.’ Pass the onion John.
ELIZABETH Hurley and Steve Bing, parents of Damian, 17, have finally joined forces to contest the attempt by Bing’s father Peter to exclude Damian from the family fortune. Steve famously only accepted the boy was his after a DNA test in 2002. Unlucky-in-love Liz had to endure the embarrassment of Bing publicly insisting they were ‘not in an exclusive relationship’ at the time of Damian’s conception in 2001.
FRIENDS of World Snooker boss Barry Hearn believe he should be in the frame for a knighthood because of his generous charity work. Bad news. Snooker promoters (and players) don’t get Ks. Fifteen-time world champion Joe Davis got an OBE as did Steve Davis (six titles) and Ronnie O’Sullivan (five). Stephen Hendry (seven) got an MBE. John Pulman (eight) got nothing. At least Hearn’s other sport, boxing has a knight: Henry Cooper, honoured twenty-nine years after his last fight.