Fringe can’t compete with farce in Gorgie and Leith
YOU have to love Edinburgh in August. No, seriously. It’s actually a local by-law. Residents and council tax payers are simply not allowed to complain about the … well, you know. Just take the leaflet, smile and move on. Slowly weaving your way through the crowds of visitors whose ability to halt suddenly, while moving six abreast, would make the best-drilled graduates of Sandhurst gasp in astonished admiration. The always-welcome crowds of tourists, with their hard currency and delightful inability to pronounce the name of Scotland’s capital city, certainly shouldn’t think that the many, many glum faces they can see around
Edin-burr-ow are a reflection on their presence. This fast-spreading dark cloud of gloom, you see, is all about football. Soccer. Calcio. Le foot. Hearts fans are currently only consoling themselves with the knowledge that they told everyone how bad this season was going to be. Their Hibs counterparts, meanwhile, are being reminded that optimism can be a terrible, terrible thing. Taking Paul Heckingbottom’s boys first, there is no excuse for Sunday’s shipping of six goals at Ibrox. No matter what kind of form Rangers were in. Regardless of the red card.
Heckingbottom said last week that everyone at Hibs was now ‘under the pump’ because new owner Ronald Gordon is closely examining every single department with a view to making improvements. The manager has to know that presiding over such a humiliating hammering doesn’t look good in a performance review. Across the city, of course, the standing joke among Jambos is that director of football Craig Levein is the only person capable of judging whether head coach Craig Levein is doing a good job. In all seriousness, the former Scotland boss has exercised complete control of the entire football department since
Ian Cathro’s departure early last season. Whatever happens from here, it’ll be because of the signings he’s made — and the tactics he’s deploying. Hearts go to Fir Park in the Betfred Cup on Friday night. Then take on Celtic in Glasgow eight days later. As dates go, they look about as promising as taking an all-male touring production of Little Women into the nation’s toughest prisons. Still, if things on the pitch don’t improve, Hearts and Hibs fans could just get together and catch a couple of good shows over the next couple of weeks. And thank their lucky stars that they don’t support Kilmarnock.