Naked truth about modest Amanda ...

CONGRATULATIONS to Amanda Holden, who has finally got her money back on that Modesty Course she signed up for last year.

Here she is, pictured with her full refund, in an image she posted online yesterday.

What on earth went wrong, I hear you ask.

Well. Before the pandemic began, Miss Holden checked into the Convent of Torment in the Parish of Banish The Lavish in a little town called Humble.

Perhaps the 50-year-old star was determined to put her exhibitionist ways behind her; after all, she often appears on television and pictured on social media platforms wearing little more than two buttons and a ribbon.

In a bid to curb these excesses, Amanda attended a three-day seminar called Humility In The Workplace And Beyond, aimed at teaching celebrities the art of decorum in public life.

She took classes in Mastering Modesty, How To Take A Boast-Free Selfie, The Beauty Of Moderation In All Things and a module called Stealth Cleavage — You Don’t Always Have To Show And Tell.

The Convent said they were happy to give Miss Holden a refund because she was ‘a lost cause’ who had ‘never worn a cardi in her life’.