Out Of The Mouths Of Babes

WHEN my son stuart was seven, he overheard his friend Katie’s mum telling their teacher she was due to go into hospital for a routine operation and her daughter

One-line Philosophers

MY HUSBAND complains things aren’t as good as they used to be, without realising he’s one of those things.

Mrs Valerie Ashton, London N14.

GARDENERS are raking it in. Warren Brown, Falmouth, Cornwall.

Joke

AN EMPLOYMENT agency sent me for an interview at a poultry farm as a stock taker. I’m optimistic, but not counting my chickens.

Terry Gullick, Bristol. was quite anxious about it. stuart piped up: ‘Huh, my nan went in there and didn’t come out again!’

Rita Roberts, Wolverhampton, W. Mids.

Wordy Wise

WE BUY ANY BAR.COM — and that turns your area into a social desert.

Mark Wraith, Newark, Notts.

INTEREST CRATES — large boxes arousing curiosity.

Dave Cullen, Leeds.

LOTTOMAN — gambler’s empire.

Sylvia Dugard, Witney, Oxon.

GORDONZOLA — little known and slightly whiffy brother of emile.

Antony Dean, Keighley, W. Yorks.

LA GIOCONGA — Mona lisa’s favourite dance.

Alan poulton, Wimborne, Dorset.