Millions of us have every right to be alarmed by new SNP law
THERE is a wonderful exchange at the start of Douglas Adams’s Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy when the protagonist, Arthur Dent, discovers just minutes before that his house is set for demolition.
When he protests, a council official points out the plans have been on display in the local planning office for the past nine months.
Yes, Arthur replies, but only in a basement with the lights out, at the bottom of a locked filing cabinet stuck in a disused lavatory with a sign on the door saying beware of the leopard.
Now I’m not saying this is the exact Holyrood location the Scottish Government have chosen to keep their new regulations on fire safety requiring all households to install interlinked smoke alarms by February 1, but it can’t be far off.
Why else would it be that 1.3million homes in Scotland have yet to be fitted with the alarms less than ten days ahead of the deadline? Astonishing figures suggest that only 17 per cent of Scottish homes are compliant, meaning that by a week on Tuesday, the vast majority of Scots will be breaking the law.
I will confess that I am one of the many (and I do take a little comfort in knowing how many of us there are) who has not, yet, had my home fitted with interlinked smoke alarms.
IWAS, I recall, dimly aware of it at some point last year, but it was swiftly filed away in the ‘deal with later’ cupboard, where it has lain undisturbed ever since. Why? Well, like many of us, I have never seen one of the TV adverts the Scottish Government has apparently put out warning of the changes.
I rarely watch live television these days, and on the occasions I do, I’m inundated with images of an avuncular looking Jason Leitch telling me to take a lateral flow test every time I cross the threshold.
I have also, like everyone else in Scotland, had quite a lot on my plate. The vast, ever-shifting changes to coronavirus regulations (oh for the simplicity of an English Plan B) mean that it’s hard enough as it is to keep up with what’s happening.
Most have been too busy trying not to catch or spread a potentially deadly virus to worry about anything else the
Government is trying to get us to do, particularly when they haven’t really bothered trying to tell us about it.
As Tory housing spokesman Miles Brigg said this week: ‘The SNP’s dismal forward planning and lack of research has made these requirements completely unachievable in the current timescale.’
Even the heavy-handed legislation itself, while I appreciate it is at heart an attempt at fire safety, seems entirely, finger-waggingly on brand for this Government.
This is, after all, an SNP that wants to tell us what we can say, what we can think, how much we should eat and drink. Their tactics make Jacob ReesMogg’s nanny look light-handed.
And there are further issues. For those now scrabbling to get themselves compliant in time it would appear to be a confusing market place out there. A quick Google search yields dozens of results with prices ranging from £11.99 to, I kid you not, £279 for a full set of kit that promises to be compliant with the Housing (Scotland) Act 1987. I honestly wouldn’t know where to start.
Even then, there may be little point. Retailers are selling out of interlinked smoke alarms left, right and centre as many people like myself make a lastminute dash to stay ahead of the law.
The Tory MSP Jeremy Balfour said he went to every B&Q in Edinburgh this week and found no availability until after the law comes into force.
Many other retailers are already saying they won’t be able to deliver in time for the February deadline. Even the £279 kit comes with a note saying ‘delivery time may exceed six weeks’.
Perhaps it’s time the Scottish Government pushed back their delivery time of a law that, as it stands, will create more problems than it solves.
And perhaps, this time, they could put their plans on display where we can see them.