Is it ever OK to sit in your front garden?

...and other new outdoor etiquette no-nos

Since the balmy days of the first lockdown two years ago, those of us lucky enough to have gardens have been spending more time in them than ever before.

The trend for indoor/outdoor living shows no sign of abating, and our relationship with our green spaces has changed for ever. The moment the sun appears it feels like we’ve gained an extra room in which to relax, dine, socialise, exercise or work.

However, unless you live in a mansion set in several acres, what we do in our gardens will likely impact the neighbours.

in fact, as an etiquette expert and co-author of Debrett’s A-Z Of Modern Manners, i’ve received more questions about the dos and don’ts of garden usage over the past two years than ever before.

So, as the weather warms up, here’s my guide to the rules we must all abide by when taking our indoor lives outside...

SMALLS A BIG DEAL

NOTHING heralds the joys of spring and summer quite like the fresh smell of line-dried linen. it used to be considered not terribly smart to peg out your washing, but these days, as it’s way better for the environment than putting load after load in the tumble dryer, and far more economical, it’s fine — with one major exception.

if you’re overlooked from any angle, you must draw the line at putting out your lingerie. children’s pants and vests are fine, but neighbours don’t want to see your smalls — especially anything racy that might encourage their minds towards thoughts of what goes on behind closed doors.

And do you really want the man from number nine wondering if you’re wearing the thong he saw on the line the previous day when you bump into him in the butchers? i think not.

HOT TUB HORRORS

ONCE the preserve of ski chalets and footballers’ wives, sales of hot tubs rose by 1,000 per cent in the summer of 2020.

Unreasonable though it may be for neighbours to complain about you sharing a bottle of fizz with friends while luxuriating in warm bubbles at midnight on the occasional Saturday, it is bad form not to put a lid on things — or at least keep the noise down — later in the evening. And it’s fair to say that after 10pm on school nights, people need their sleep.

However, it’s not only when these tubs are in use that discord can arise, as many of them make a constant humming sound, which can really crank up during cleaning cycles.

Minimise the annoyance risk by buying a model with good sound insulation, be sure to position it away from where your neighbours have their seating area and avoid installing it on decking, which can amplify the vibrations.

And never, ever get frisky in it. Leave that sort of thing to the Love island lot.

THE FINAL FRONTIER

FRONT gardens are generally small and lack privacy, so it’s rare to see people making use of them — and with good reason.

even if it’s the only outdoor space you have, say at the entrance to a block of flats, your fellow residents don’t want to see you sprawled out in a bikini when they arrive home.

Sitting unobtrusively catching a few rays while drinking a cup of tea and reading a book first thing is just about Ok; however, spending hours staring out onto the street is likely to make your neighbours feel uneasy.

And don’t even think about playing music, chatting raucously on the phone or setting up a picnic out there — all of which are bound to get on your neighbours’ nerves.

BBQ BATTLES

IT’S not just noise which is impolite, you need to think of other people when it comes to pongs, too. not everyone loves the scent of charred sausages.

if you know your neighbours are at home, then the polite thing to do is send them a text message to let them know you’ll be lighting the charcoals in half an hour in case they have washing out, or windows open.

Also, position the barbecue carefully so that the smoke doesn’t waft directly over the fence into next door’s garden.

And if you have friends over, be aware of the tendency to congregate around the barbecue, especially for San Miguelswilling men, who can never resist putting their two pence in about the best way to keep a flame alight.

TO BIKINI OR NOT?

WHILE bikinis and swimming costumes are fine during the warm months, going topless or, worse, naked, in any garden that’s overlooked is most certainly not all right.

The retirees next door and the couple with young children, bouncing on a trampoline on the other side, don’t want to glance over the fence and alight on you in your birthday suit.

Living next door to a naturist is, frankly, embarrassing: there have been prosecutions for ‘outraging public decency’ after complaints from neighbours.

BEWARE BIFOLDS

THEY’RE the ultimate middleclass status symbol, so many people may find it tempting to sit in the kitchen and keep those lovely bifolds flung back.

But bear in mind that you are effectively removing the back wall of your house, so every word and sound is likely to be audible to the neighbours.

Although more likely to remain sotto voce outside, you may feel, in the privacy of your own home, perfectly entitled to have a blazing row — or, heaven forbid, be rude about the neighbours.

even animated conversations or playing loud music in the kitchen with the doors open can be annoying, so keep the volume down — or shut the doors.