Scottish Daily Mail

Ephraim Hardcastle

- Email: john.mcentee@dailymail.co.uk

WHEN Meghan told Oprah Winfrey she was offered no on-the-job training for Royal Family membership, she wasn’t to know Prince Charles was striving to rectify the problem, with an internal royal household report recommendi­ng a training programme for future ‘working royals’. Aimed at the next generation – William’s children and onwards rather than the current crop – it is still a work in progress. Is it too late to enrol Meghan?

LIVERPOOL fans who booed FA president Prince William at the FA Cup final now pin their hopes on Aston Villa beating Manchester City so the reds can snatch the Premier League title from City’s grasp. And who is Villa’s most famous fan? William!

BORIS Johnson’s unkempt hair irks sister Rachel’s husband Ivo Dawnay, who compares it to the outdated joke of Tommy Cooper’s fez. ‘The briefest encounter with a comb – or maybe just a parting – could possibly be all that is needed,’ he writes in The Spectator, adding: ‘But I fear it is not to be. Such an act would metaphoric­ally amount to some kind of apology.’ Does BoJo, like Samson, believe his moptop gives him strength?

WHAT has Gail Porter, pictured, in common with the Queen? ‘I’m on a postage stamp in Indonesia,’ explains the former Top Of The Pops presenter: ‘I was like, “What have I done in Indonesia? Unless they’ve got some sort of weird channel that’s picking up on Nineties stuff”.’

ODDBALL MP Michael Fabricant’s tweet that his and Conservati­ve colleagues’ attendance at yesterday’s PMQs was also about proving they weren’t the politician arrested on suspicion of rape enrages Labour’s Chris Bryant. ‘Take this down now,’ he fumes. ‘It shows callous disregard for the alleged victims.’ An unrepentan­t Fabricant responds: ‘No one is making light of rape or assault… but those who want to read something into a comment will contrive to do so whatever. They are profession­al offence-takers.’

MACARTHUR Park composer Jimmy Webb claims that Richard Harris drove Richard Burton and him to a Wales-England rugby match in Cardiff in Princess Margaret’s old Phantom V Rolls-Royce, arriving at the venue claiming to have a VIP sitting behind the tinted windows. ‘He was ushered in,’ Webb tells Record Collector magazine. ‘And drove through the stadium entrance, parking the car right in the middle of the pitch.’ To paraphrase your famous song: Has someone left the truth out in the rain, Jimmy?

HOLLYWOOD star Gabriel Byrne asked his father, who was lukewarm about his abandoning the priesthood to become an actor, to attend his stage debut in Dublin. ‘He said, “How much is it?” I said, “It’s £5.” He said, “I can see you for nothing. Why would I pay £5 to see you?”’

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