‘Final promise was for kids to make mummy proud’
DOTING mum Teresa Smyth was just two months away from giving birth to her second child when she was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer.
Despite the devastating news, she vowed to carry on with the birth as normal and tackle the aggressive disease afterwards.
But she was only able to spend seven months with her baby son before she died in 2015.
Her grieving husband Stephen, who met Teresa in 2007 and married her in 2013, has lived as a single dad with his two young children, Ayda, six, and George, three, ever since.
“The last thing I promised Teresa was that I’d do anything and everything for our kids so they’d grow up to make their mummy proud,” said Stephen.
“That’s what I have been trying to do since, with the fantastic support of her parents, my parents and my sister.”
Stephen, 38, worked as a chef but gave it up to become a full-time dad to his “beautiful, busy children” after Teresa’s death from non-Hodgkin lymphoma.
“Being a parent is a gift, a life-changing experience,” he added.
“Ayda likes to play games and make things while George likes the outdoors and generally making a mess.
“Lately we’ve been going up to the Taff Trail as the kids were both lucky enough to have bikes for their birthdays from their Grampy.
“They both have their own interests – Ayda loves swimming and gymnastics, while George likes singing and playing with his action toys – but enjoy soft play, and pizza and film nights.”
Despite making great strides as a single parent, Stephen admits that with Teresa by his side they made a “great parenting team”.
“When one of us was lacking patience, the other was calm and ready to go. It just worked,” said Stephen, from Rhydyfelin, near Pontypridd.
“I’ve tried not to dwell too much on the fact it’s all on me now. I have routines and try and be as organised as I can.
“For example, if they’re happy playing I try to get a few things done around the house, perhaps run the vacuum over the floor. That way when they go to sleep at around 8pm I can sit down and chill out, have something to eat if I haven’t been able to, perhaps watch a film. Sometimes it’s easier said than done, though.”
After a nationwide search that attracted entries from right across Wales, Stephen was chosen as one of four families to be named as the new faces of the Welsh Government’s positive parenting campaign.
The search was part of the “Parenting: Give it Time” campaign that provides support and advice to parents of young children in Wales and shows how encouraging and praising children for good behaviour is more effective than harsh punishments for challenging behaviour.
The four families, from Rhydyfelin, Rhyl, Newport and Swansea, were selected by a panel of parenting experts from more than 200 online entries.
The chosen families have agreed to share their personal experiences of the joys and challenges of bringing up a young family in the hope that other parents can benefit from their stories.
Stephen added: “I think the biggest thing I have learned is that there is no magic formula to parenting.
“Just surround yourself with family and friends – and if you need help, then ask for it.”
The website www.gov.wales/giveittime deals with specific issues and offers parenting advice, including toddler tantrums and potty training, and addresses the challenges associated with a child’s development from birth to five years old.