HUBLOT BIG BANG REFEREE 2018 FIFA WORLD CUP RUSSIA

That is some name for a watch. Isn’t it just. The Hublot Big Bang Referee 2018 FIFA World Cup Russia is a limited-edition smartwatch launching ahead of this summer’s finals. Hublot is the tournament’s official timekeeper, and a special version of its latest wearable will be worn by the refs. They’ll be using them to keep track of stoppages and no doubt disappoint thousands of face-painted tourists by relaying decisions made by goal-line tech.

But… I’m not a referee. Not to worry. There’s a consumer version of the Big Ba… oh, you know, the watch. It’s still geared towards football, keeping you up to date with everything going on in Russia. That means wrist-based announcements before kick-off, as well as notifications about cards and substitutions. Best of all, the word ‘GOAL’ will flash up every time the ball ends up in the back of the net. We’ll have to wait and see if that’s a feature England fans will get to experience, but at least you’ll be kept in the loop when you have to make a toilet dash.

That doesn’t sound at all like information I could just get from an app on my phone! What else? You can customise the watch with 32 different dials, each inspired by the flags of participating countries. The watch is kitted with an Intel Atom Z34XX processor and runs on Android Wear OS, so you can load it up with all the usual smartwatch apps. You get a 400x400 AMOLED display, an accelerometer, gyroscope, GPS, NFC and one-day battery life.

Fair enough, forgive the cynicism. How can I get one? If you’re serious about dropping the best part of £4000 on a watch that sort of expires after a month, you’ll need to move faster than Neymar’s feet and get to your nearest Hublot stockist. They’re only selling 2018 of ’em worldwide.

THE WORD ‘GOAL’ WILL FLASH UP EVERY TIME THE BALL ENDS UP IN THE NET