Stars give the lowdown on our natural highs
THANK God for our green and pleasant land, otherwise celebrities would be bereft of anywhere to film their now ubiquitous travelogues. If you hadn’t noticed, they’ve been doggedly criss-crossing the country over the past few weeks for our viewing pleasure – along with reminding us that we’re largely stuck indoors!
With only a hovering drone for company, they’re walking, wild swimming (way too much flesh on display from both Robson Green and Rick Stein), driving, hiking and eating.yes, there is much eating.and it all looks wonderfully Covid-secure, ruining our chance to leap up saying, “They’re too close to each other!” only to realise it was filmed last summer.
And suddenly everyone loves Cornwall. So they should.we’ve had Susan Calman’s Grand Days Out (Channel 5, Thursday), Britain’s Best Walks with Julia Bradbury (ITV, Sunday), Devon & Cornwall (Channel 4, tomorrow) narrated by John Nettles and food maestro Rick Stein’s Cornwall (BBC Two, Thursday), who continues to delight, and can at least claim to live there.
“Mr Padstein”, as he’s known in his home in Padstow, is even quite militant. “On my travels I’ve noticed just how good everything is here.we should cast off from the rest of the country.” Not another vote!
It’s often said these programmes are the TV equivalent of a coffee table book. I think more a nice quality magazine in a dentist’s waiting room where you idly flip through the pages looking at lovely coastal scenes – in Cornwall of course – before you’re disturbed with, “You can go in now...”
But they’re not just conquering Cornwall. Robson Green has cast his line northward, over Hadrian’s Wall (Channel 5, Thursday).
The Geordie is a natural history presenter too. No, not shows about monkeys. “This wonder wall, it’s up there with the great Pyramids”. Eat your heart out, Simon Schama.
It’s impossible not to like Robson. He can be a tad sentimental but he is also full of life’s joys and carries with him great enthusiasm, especially for this ancient edifice which, let’s face it, is only 10 per cent of what it used to be in Roman times. Seems like only yesterday.
He’s also very friendly.with one cheery chap who had come along to teach Robson about geocaching (eh?), he even managed to tell him what shows he’d been in. How helpful.
My highlight was seeing the pretty village of “Wall”, built with stone donated by Hadrian. So that’s where it went! Robson also buried his own time capsule near his hometown of Hexham, containing “20 big ones” in cash. It’s near a tree on a footpath.
The Pembrokeshire Murders (ITV, Monday–wednesday) was so dour and grim I could happily have switched off after 10 minutes. Crucially, as a drama, why is it there? Apparently, accomplished lead actor Luke Evans has been very keen on the project for years and, as a cold case story, it definitely shows the determination of one policeman, Detective Superintendent Steve Wilkins, to see justice for the four murder victims and their families. It did gather pace in the second episode, but do we really need three hours of this story as a “drama”? Why not a documentary?
The first 60 minutes was not at all dramatic. It wasn’t even a whodunit, more a how-they-nabbed-him.the only tension in the first episode came just before Wilkins was about to be interviewed by an ITV journalist about re-opening the case. He was simply a bit nervous.
There was one bizarre moment, however, as the two detectives began their investigation on the estate at the centre of investigation.as the pair looked thoughtfully down the path leading from the houses,wilkins, who had driven there, pulled out a hip flask from his coat pocket to share with his work partner.thankfully by the second episode,wilkins was ordering a lager shandy in the pub.
There is a temptation for TV producers to mine the archive of grisly serial killers and cause celebre. But the right ingredients need to be there. Despite the five-star performances from Evans and Keith Allen’s creepy serial killer, I was mostly becalmed.
Finally, has global warming arrived in Death In Paradise (BBC One, Thursday)? Everyone is starting to look shinier and sweatier, and that includes the locals and their guests who arrive on the island of Saint Marie with great frequency to murder each other. This time it was archaeologists.
While the weather may be hotter, the scripts are far from perfect and, to be honest, could do with another rewrite. In fact, they’re sounding decidedly “daytime” in quality, with apologies to our good friend Father Brown (BBC One, Monday – Friday). Characters are always explaining things while they’re doing them.we’re not 12.
But I did enjoy lead actor Ralf Little’s unexpected nod to many of his long-time fans perched on the sofa – “There’s nothing more British than watching a cookery show while eating a takeaway”. Fish and chips from Rick Stein would do nicely, thanks.