Geared up for a pedestrian world
MY GRANDSON drove off in his brand new Mercedes after Christmas. My present to him, lucky little chap. When I say he “drove off” I should add that his feet were on the floor and he’s not quite two. But I’m happy to say that he takes after me in that he becomes ridiculously excited by the sight of a big fast car.
Sadly he’s not on the right side of history. Being a petrol head is just not acceptable any more in polite society. Cars are bad polluters and must be discouraged. The future is bicycles, public transport and responsible car-sharing.
Pretty soon we won’t even be allowed to drive our own cars as autonomous vehicles will do it for us.
We’ll just sit there.always the passenger, never the driver. It’s no way to live your life.
Once a rite of passage, the driving test at 17 is no longer on every teenager’s wish list. And I read last week those who do bother to learn to drive are increasingly taking their tests in automatics.
In 2008 just under four per cent did that. Now it’s 14 per cent. Lessons focus on electric cars – how to conserve battery and drive with one Toytown pedal – instead of learning clutch control and gear change.
Changing gear while my dad drove was one of the highlights of my childhood. Dad regarded a smooth gear change as an essential accomplishment for a young lady, along with a knowledge of the mysteries of double de-clutching. I’d judge young men not only on their looks and taste in music, but also by their driving skills. A nicely assured change down plus acceleration and then up into fifth would always make my heart beat faster.
If you watched the TV series Mad Men set in the 1960s you’ll remember how the odious Pete Campbell manages to crash a Chevy Camaro in the showroom because he didn’t know how to drive what the Americans call a “stick shift” and threw it in to reverse. Pathetic.
But of course when Don Draper got behind the wheel of a brand new E-type Jag he knew exactly what he was doing.vroom, vroom.
Oh and the sound! There’s a section on the A3 when you round a bend, enter the 70mph zone and put your foot down. I used to look forward to that when I had my little Porsche. Electric cars are snoopy and silent. No vroom at all.
We who learned to drive on manuals understand that it’s “real” driving. The wussy lot who only know automatics will never understand the thrill of controlling and feeling the soul of a machine that comes with changing gears.
Like knowing how to change a plug, changing gears is fast becoming another obsolete skill. The modern world is just so pedestrian.