SPFL bumbling their way through mess like Naked Gun star
We’re used to comparing football hasn’t had a preScottish football to movies. season that long for more
These days it’s Titanic, we’ve than a decade. Our teams already had Armageddon and involved in Europe are lucky now we’re seeing the sequel. to get a fortnight off.
But the longer this goes on, You suspect it’s down to the it’s clear our game is more like Scottish government calling Naked Gun. the shots – and we’ve been
The SPFL isn’t Leslie Nielsen’s left like poor old Nordberg. bumbling detective Frank The clubs are scrambling to Drebin though – we’re more like work out how they can afford his pal Officer Nordberg. four grand a week to do the
You’ll remember the guy. testing needed to get back He was played by OJ Simpson but where is Holyrood on this? before he was famous for his There is a knock-on effect 1990s courtroom drama. to industries up and down
Nordberg was either the the land. Pubs, restaurants, unluckiest guy in the world or transport, sports shops, food the luckiest, suffering all kinds suppliers, the list of of misfortune but managing not businesses handcuffed to to get killed. football is endless.
In his first scene he bumbles Neil Doncaster worked it into a drugs bust on a boat, gets out as worth £250million to shot, bumps his nut, tthe country’s falls into wet paint, e economy but to ppi it grandchild and they teased jams his hand in a plenty of punters he was looking to escape his window, falls face it’s priceless.
first into wedding They will need babysitting duties.
cake, stands on a to hold fire until Durrant said: “My f irst bear trap then we get to Phase
wwFc c granddaughter is on the way staggers out and Four in the big at the end of June so I’m falls into the water. comeback but SSn looking forward to that but And yet survives. Scottish football the babysitting will go on the That’s where we needs to still be back burner. are with Scottish standing s when “The aspirations of the club football right now. we w get there.
The SPFL is walking It would take are really high. You’re waiting aaa
around bumping about 4000 tests for the opportunity and when into lamp posts and a week to get the you get over 50 it’s just getting stepping on rakes. SPFL S going again, a chance in football. We just have to hope which should be a wwd
“The sad fact is that you’re we’ll come out alive. drop in the ocean waiting for somebody to get We’ve had the in a country of sacked or leave their job. botched end of the almost a six million.
“There are times when you campaign, the farce But Scotland wonder if your time passed,so of the Reconstruction Task barely tests 2000 individuals
Force and now round two of the a day – with only seven per
I’m grateful. Whatever years
Ann Budge begging letters to cent of them members of the I’ve got left, I’m going to make save them from relegation. public who are not health care good use of them.” There’s more chance of me staff or frontline key workers. fitting into a pair of skinny jeans No one is saying the these days than Hearts’ latest government should pay for plan going through this week. the testing in football. It can’t
It’s a giant waste of time when be justified if they can’t afford everyone should be working out to do enough of them on the just how the game is planning to general population. get back in the next few weeks. But if they figure out how to
The Scottish Government has ramp it up, they must lend a given the green light to resume helping hand. This lot are the training in less than a fortnight first ones to hop on the football with a view to resuming behind bandwagon for a PR win. closed doors on August 1. Scottish football needs help
Someone is going to have to rather than Sturgeon doing a explain to us why we need to Drebin by slapping the SPFL wait six weeks from training to on the back and sending the playing, mind you. Scottish wheelchair flying.