Quotes of the week

I’m not that stupid

Prince Charles vows to stop meddling when he

finally becomes king

Sorry I’m late!

Record breaker Ross Edgley arrives back in Kent after swimming the 1,791 mile British coastline in 157 days. He thought it

would take 100

Everybody who does a stressful job needs a way to switch off, mine’s Lego

Culture Secretary

Jeremy Wright reveals his passion for

building Lego models, including a 4,500 piece

Star Wars’ Death Star

I am a young god... I’m in great shape and I want this to be recognised

Dutchman Emile Ratelband, 69, wants to

wipe 20 years off his official age – in the same way transgender people change sex – to help find love on dating app Tinder

There isn’t one law for the famous and one for the rest of the community

High Court judge Mr Justice Mostyn ticks off Ant McPartlin for failing to attend his divorce case

I said ‘I can’t kiss you, can I?’ And he said ‘No, you don’t’

Actress Emma

Thompson fails to break

convention while receiving her damehood from

Prince William

You are a rude, terrible person

Donald Trump loses his

cool with CNN’s Jim Acosta after the reporter refuses to hand back his

microphone at a White House press conference

Life will certainly seem longer

Tory MP Desmond Swayne

on government advice that we should drink less

and exercise more

Who wants all this newfangled 4K Ultra HD, satellite dishes or a screen that’s bigger than your room when you can have glorious black and white TV?

TV and radio historian Jeffrey Borinsky is not surprised by news that 7,161 people still have a

black and white set