Sunday Mirror (Northern Ireland) - - News -

If all 4.5 tril­lion cig­a­rette butts dropped in the world each year were laid end to end, they would go round the Earth 2,852 times – or to Mars and back.

I doubt that statis­tic would have brought much com­fort to Matt Da­mon’s as­tro­naut when he was stranded on the Red Planet in galac­tic Robin­son Cru­soe movie The Mar­tian.

But now nearly half of Britain’s lo­cal au­thor­i­ties are try­ing to re­duce the num­ber of fag ends that are thrown away care­lessly. They add up to the globe’s worst plas­tic pol­lu­tion. I’ve been fined twice by their litter po­lice. That makes me a bad per­son – and I’m bad­der still for smok­ing, the one ac­tiv­ity where declar­ing “I’m not a quit­ter” shows weak­ness, not strength.

En­vi­ron­men­tal cops lie in wait for the likes of me be­cause we’re easy hits. They know that those most likely to litter the pave­ments are smok­ers dis­card­ing their butts.

But I’ve learned my les­son now. And I’m fully be­hind Keep Britain Tidy’s #BinTheButt cam­paign. Tory rebels Sam

Gy­imah (left) and Alis­tair Burt sus­pected Boris John­son’s dark-arts en­thu­si­ast Do­minic Cum­mings was up to his old tricks when their Com­mons passes stopped work­ing im­me­di­ately af­ter they had voted against the Gov­ern­ment.

Cum­mings might be re­spon­si­ble for much foul play, in­clud­ing get­ting the two for­mer min­is­ters sacked as Tories, but this wasn’t one of them.

It was merely a tech­ni­cal glitch, which was quickly rec­ti­fied.

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