Cleese moans planet is ‘lit­tered’ with his exes & kids are a ‘pain in the a *** ’


COM­EDY leg­end John Cleese re­fuses to look on the bright side of life when it comes to par­ent­ing and his three failed mar­riages. The 79-year-old, whose film hits in­clude 1979’s The Life of Brian, said the planet is “lit­tered” with his ex-wives and hav­ing kids is “a pain in the a***”. Re­fer­ring to his Monty Python pals, he said: “Eric Idle has been mar­ried 40 years, Michael Palin 50. Ev­ery­one claps when you men­tion this. I say this is just fail­ure of imag­i­na­tion. I’ve been mar­ried 42 years if you add the bits to­gether.

“Young peo­ple have kids and then spend the next 30 years look­ing after them. For what, I don’t know.

“It makes you less self­ish. Ba­si­cally they are a pain in the a*** as they cost a for­tune and you have no con­trol over that, and they are never grate­ful. But I do have a good one, the other one is OK. The planet is lit­tered with my ex-wives.”

Cleese has spent nearly £25mil­lion in di­vorce set­tle­ments to date. He wed Fawlty Tow­ers co-star Con­nie Booth in 1968 and they had daugh­ter Cyn­thia.

He then tied the knot with Amer­i­can ac­tress Bar­bara Tren­tham in 1981 and HERE’S 80s pop icon Rick Ast­ley branch­ing out into thrash mu­sic to film his new video. The Never Gonna Give You Up singer sees red when a dodgy Del Boy-style three-wheeler lets him down and deserts him. Rick, 52, jumps up and down in a rage and, copy­ing John Cleese in 70s com­edy clas­sic Fawlty Tow­ers, gives his car a lash­ing. Then, in a scene wor­thy of Only Fools and Horses, he man­ages to get him­self wet, wet, wet, with a hosepipe. But Rick’s shoot for She Makes Me in leafy Sur­rey was a world away from Del’s Peck­ham. Ac­cord­ing to the al­bum the song’s from, its a Beau­ti­ful Life. So why act like such a plonker? they had daugh­ter Camilla in 1984, di­vorc­ing in 1990. Two years later, he mar­ried Amer­i­can psy­chother­a­pist Alyce Faye Eichel­berger.

They di­vorced in 2008 and the set­tle­ment gave her £12mil­lion in fi­nance and as­sets. Cleese’s cur­rent wife, Jen­nifer Wade, is 32 years his ju­nior.

The comic also spoke of the de­men­tia plight of Python co-star Terry Jones, 76, on co­me­dian Marc Maron’s pod­cast.

He said: “Terry is def­i­nitely not go­ing to get bet­ter, ac­cord­ing to ev­ery doc­tor. He gets lost so that is very sad.”

RICK GIVES STICK Star lashes car HOP­PING MAD Vent­ing his fury G-AST­LEY Rick soaks him­self SMART MOVE Dap­per Rick FAWLTY Cleese in clas­sic rant

NOT AMUSED John Cleese

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