STOP TAKING UNCIVIL LIBERTIES
Some contestants in I’m A Celebrity have been told to change their underpants more than once every three days to “keep coronavirus at bay”.
Have they discovered the cause of coronavirus is not changing underpants often enough? If so, there was a period between when I was 19 and 22 when I don’t think I changed them once. Maybe I caused the whole thing, and it’s been slowly spreading ever since. I suppose I should apologise, or at least get my Head of Standards to resign.
I’m fascinated by people who shout: “It’s an attack on my civil liberties” because they’re asked to wear a face mask in shops.
They seem to think they’re freedomfighters, like Nelson Mandela.
Because just as he was jailed for 27 years, they’re expected to wear something in Morrisons that makes their nose itch.
“It should be a matter of choice what I wear,” they say.
Maybe that’s true, and that right is more important than any potential health risk. In the same way, if
I want to let some crocodiles loose in a school playground that should be my right, and I don’t see why I should be stopped by some interfering teacher.
Some of them are now angry about the vaccine. “I won’t be vaccinated,” they say. “I read an article on the internet that says the vaccine will be full of weapons-grade p g plutonium so you light up in the th dark to enable the CIA to track you at night so they can keep files about w which side of the bed you sleep i in.
“And on top of that, it turns you into a zebra.”
I think thin the point they’re trying t to make is we were much he healthier before we had medicin medicine, back in the 12th centu century when we had a life
e expectancy of six.