David McClay
Gets on board with a motorhome for a family trip to Dorset
Back a bit, back a bit, bit more… stop! Forward a bit, back a bit, keep going…. WHOA! Chuck in a muttered curse here and a look of despair there and, bingo, you have successfully parked your Chausson Flash 25.
This motorhome lark is easy.
Mild panic had set in when I first clapped eyes on the six-berth behemoth we had hired for the weekend. How the heck would I get to grips with this 23ft-long whopper of a wagon?
Thankfully, after some tips and words of reassurance from the nice people at motorhome specialists Vaaroom in Romford, East London, it soon became a lot less daunting. In fact it’s amazing how quickly you settle into the driving seat.
And so, after a near miss with a stop sign at our very first junction, we were chugging along cheerily in our diesel-powered dwelling all the way to Dorset.
The irony, though. Fresh from a year of being cooped up in Covid captivity, perhaps spending three nights with the family in this 18sq yd humble abode on wheels wasn’t the brightest idea. Honey, I shrunk the house.
If this doesn’t crank the kids’ petty squabbling up to 11, nothing will.
Stay tuned for an episode of Breaking Dad.
But I am glad to report we not only survived – we thrived. In fact, we’re already planning our next motorhome escapade (with added parking sensors).
These things come with all mod cons. Hob, oven, fridge, shower, toilet, TV and just enough room to swing a cat (not sure why you would want to, though).
Our girls, eight and six (strange names, I know), made a beeline for the bunk beds while my wife and I kipped on the surprisingly spacious and comfy level above the driver’s compartment. The lounge area also transforms into a sleeping area for two.
Sure, it comes with its problems (see parking, above). But if you want adventure and don’t mind the odd mishap or two, a motorhome holiday could be for you. An electrical malfunction (OK, operator error…) meant we spent our first night huddled round the fold-out dining table, eating takeaway pizza in the dark. But we had a right old laugh. On day two, the heating didn’t work (OK, operator error… next time I promise to read the provided instruction manual) but we had a ball playing board games, wearing bobble hats and wrapped up in sleeping bags. Now that is making memories.
As for the daily cleaning out of the cassette toilet, you kind of get used to it.
We stayed at the well managed and well positioned Meadowbank holiday park in Christchurch, around five miles outside Bournemouth. From here you can cycle along the River Stour all the way into the pleasant town centre, which is dominated by a magnificent 12th-century Norman Priory.
Christchurch has one of the oldest populations in the country but you wouldn’t think it. The harbour in particular is buzzing with life and there are opportunities here for boating, fishing and all manner of watersports.
Or just kick back in the Boathouse cafe and watch the world go by with a drink and some delicious, fresh seafood.
There are also wonderful walks from here to the headland at Hengistbury and its stunning views of the Isle of Wight and Purbeck.
Three miles to the east is Mudeford Quay, which offers a similar vibe plus the bonus of an adjacent sandy beach. And crabbing. Boy, do the kids love crabbing. Mudeford is also where you will find Britain’s most expensive beach huts… one 12x10ft cabin sold for an eye-popping £325,000 last year.
You have seven miles of golden sands to choose from in these parts, but Southbourne Beach is a favourite for locals who know where to head to avoid the crowds that swarm round Bournemouth Pier. Up the road in trendy “SoBo” there are chic cafes and swish restaurants galore, but the beach is the real pull and there is always enough space to find your own spot.
Same applies in more down-atheel Boscombe (dubbed “Bos Vegas” by locals). It’s here where £3million was spent on an artificial surfing reef in the hope it would help regentrify one of Bournemouth’s most deprived areas. The doomed
These are Britain’s warmest waters and can hit 20C in summer
folly was closed two years after its launch in 2009. Still, the beach end of Boscombe ain’t too shabby and a visit to Urban Reef, where you can enjoy top-notch coffee and brunch with unrivalled vistas out to sea, is a must.
Alum Chine Beach to the west of the town centre is another cracker. Far enough away from all the hustle and bustle, this beach is backed by majestic tropical gardens and coastal pines. It takes the phrase “family friendly” and runs with it… toilets, playground, ice creams, restaurant, cafe, lifeguards – you name it, Alum Chine has it.
And don’t be afraid to brave the sea – these are some of Britain’s warmest waters and can even reach 20C in the summer.
It’s not all about the beaches down here. Get a ferry to Brownsea Island to seek out red squirrels.
Embrace your
This belter of a staycation was all the better for having our motorhome
inner Enid Blyton and ride the steam-powered Swanage Railway. Stroll round the 10-acre horticultural heaven of Poole’s Compton Acres. Get on your bike in the enchanting New
Forest. Head to Chez Fred in Westbourne for phenomenal fish and chips. Go Harry Redknapp spotting in Sandbanks (OK, maybe that’s just us…).
Back in Christchurch, the kids would not let us ignore the signs to Adventure Wonderland, a small but pleasingly queue-light theme park offering thrills and spills. They also loved racing down the dry ski slope in rubber rings at the nearby Snowtrax centre.
As staycations go, this has been a belter and all the better for having our, by
now beloved, motorhome as a base (so loved by day three we affectionately christened it Big Bertha).
It doesn’t matter if the gas runs out at the most inopportune moment, or that the TV signal is a bit dodgy, or it’s your turn to empty that dreaded cassette toilet… it’s all part of the fun.