Sunday Mirror

Barmy way to run a country

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In other countries, where they haven’t worked out how to hold elections properly, they all get to choose who runs the country.

Luckily we’re more advanced, and leave it up to 100,000 retired people who live in villages and joined the Conservati­ve Party because they want India back, and who aren’t allowed near microphone­s as they’ll almost certainly make a joke about China and cause an internatio­nal incident.

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