Keep on acting the goat, Eddie

And what’s his best position? Anyone?

Is it shoved further forwards behind a striker to create – as he did for the Cherries in the 6-3 defeat at Everton last week?

Or is it to sit further back in a role that Hodgson had earmarked for him at last year’s European Championship, to dictate the play like a quarter-back in American football?

With so little time remaining on his deal, it’s likely that Wenger was simply fattening up the calf to sell it when he agreed to l oan Wilshere to Bournemouth.

To leave him out of sight and out of mind until he saw what Howe could prise from this enigmatic talent.

Yes, the writing has been on the wall for Wilshere.

If he is to prove to Wenger he has a future at the Emirates, he needs to change up through the gears on the south coast.

Otherwise, he’ll find himself on the forecourt of a second-hand dealership – and won’t be in any way attractive to those buying at the top end of the market. WE may have the impression in this country that your average Aussie is about as bright as a broken lightbulb.

But full marks to English rugby boss Eddie Jones (right). It has taken him 12 months to realise that if everybody despises the English on a rugby field, he might as well wind them up some more.

This week, for instance, he baited the Welsh over daffodils and goats.

On that basis, in a fortnight’s time we can look forward to him slagging off the fashion and wine in Italy and the French for Agincourt, Waterloo and striking at the drop of beret.

Eddie, as long as you’re winning, keep it coming. The minute you don’t, expect it back – and then some.