TIT’S GONNA BE A GREAT SUMMER AFTER ALL!

Joy as officials announce holiday beaches WILL open to Brits in 2020

SUN, SEA, SAND AND BOOBS... That will do nicely!

MY country has suffered terribly in recent years thanks to restrictions on our economy enforced by the Germans.

We need the tourists more than ever and they will get a great Greek welcome – even the Krauts!

CABINET killjoy Grant Schapps caused a wave of gloom when he recently announced “No summer holidays this year”.

The transport secretary said social distancing and travel restrictions imposed due to the coronavirus were likely to scupper trips to the foreign sun.

Those comments were met with despair by Abta, the holiday firm trade association, and millions of Brits who enjoy an annual trip to the

Med to escape Britain’s iffy summer.

But Mr Schapps reckoned without the backbone of holiday destinations including Spain, Portugal, Italy and Greece.

As the plague subsides, the top holiday destinations are making plans to reopen their beaches.

And – despite Brexit – Brits are as welcome as always!

That means randy Brit lads will

SOAKING UP RAYS: What can be more tan-tastic!

GLOOMY OUTLOOK: Grant Schapps still be able to get their fill of saucy foreign ladies sunbathing topless on the beach!

Last week, Spain’s foreign minister Arancha Gonzalez Laya said the country will reopen to visitors at the earliest possible opportunity.

Meanwhile, Greece plans to open its borders to tourists on July 1, Italy on June 3 and the Portuguese tourist board has said a “return for tourism is not far away”.

One sun worshipper said: “If I had to spend a summer without my fix of naked teats on the beach, I’d go mad!”

WE are very worried in Portugal, as it is a place where very many older people visit to get some sunshine and, of course, it is the elderly who suffer the most with the virus.

But it looks like the worst is over and I look forward to seeing very many Brits on our beaches this summer.