£500 RISHI’S ARSE IS RED HOT!
LEADERSHIP CONTENDER’S LUST BUTTOCKS…
RISHI Sunak may be trailing in the race to succeed Boris Johnson, but his SEX ARSE is red hot at the moment!
Lust buttocks modelled on the pint- sized politician’s posterior are being snapped up by collectors.
And even USED sex arses are changing hands on the Dark Web for huge sums. One sex arse trader said: “It seems the sex arse world has decided that Rishi’s sex arse is very much the gold standard, the Rolls Royce of sex arses, if you will.
“But the trouble is, with supply lines to China being choked by the dead- eyed Commies’ knuckle- headed drive for zero- COVID, there aren’t enough Rishi sex arses to go around. “That means prices have rocketed and if you have a Rishi sex arse tucked away somewhere, you can consider yourself a wealthy person.”
The Richmond MP, who resigned as Chancellor in Boris’s Cabinet, looked until recently a sure bet to be Britain’s next PM.
But revelations about his wife’s tax status and the utter bugger he made of taxation knocked him off the heir apparent perch.
He did top the poll of Tory MPs but is not nearly so popular with the Tory grassroots members, who make the final choice of party leader.
It’s widely expected that rival Liz Truss will become leader of the party – and PM – when the results are announced next month.
As it happens, a Liz Truss sex arse FLOPPED when it was launched in July. Hoping to cash in on the Foreign Secretary’s higher profile, a few Albanian manufacturers rushed a Liz sex arse out to market.
But it failed to excite sex arse users.
A source said: “The Liz Albanian- made arses were shoddy with a low build quality and inferior finish.
“Liz Truss may win the race to be PM but she’ll always be an also- ran in the sex- arse stakes.”