Depression in a society full of ‘fake perfection’
Alot has been said about depression in recent years. We are now free to talk about it openly – at least to our GP – to discuss what it is we are feeling (or not feeling), with less fear of stain or shame.
The stigma around mental health is starting to soften. But contrary to what you might have believed, with increased exposure and better understanding, depression is in fact rapidly on the rise. It is estimated that 19.7 per cent of the British public are taking antidepressants. And it is not just adults who are being diagnosed; more than 12 per cent of students in the caused by a serotonin deficiency now seems to be a simplified answer to a very complex question. It seems that we have been misinformed about what depression is. Professor Andrew Skull of Princeton has said that attributing depression UK are depressed. So what is to low serotonin is “deeply the cause? misleading and unscientific.”
I see a lot of students There is overwhelming who suffer from depresevidence stating that the sion. Initially, they believe causes of depression are the problem to be their own from the way we live. In fact making; it is their weakness the WHO (World Health Oror softness to be cured with a ganisation), has stated that large dosage of ‘manning-up’. depression is a ‘social issue’ When the feelings of despair – simply put, it is more to do remain or increase, they see with lifestyle and environa doctor. Again, the fault is ment (what’s going on in our their own making, but this lives) than a malfunctiontime it’s a passive fault – a ing brain. We, humans, have malfunction in the brain, natural physical needs: food, a chemical imbalance, low water, clean air, warmth. If levels of serotonin to be recthese are unavailable then tified by serotonin-boosters we are in real physical danknown as antidepressants.ger. But for these students, those It is now understood that same feelings of despair inwe have natural psychologievitably reappear. cal needs too (which are just
You see, the prognosis as vital): feeling we belong, that depression is solely feeling our lives have meaning, feeling like we are seen and valued, feeling like a positive future exists for us. If these are unavailable then we are in real emotional danger. However, for lots of students, our culture doesn’t really meet these fundamental psychological needs.
So what does this all mean for depression and it’s victims? Simply put, we must consider context - we must consider circumstance. It is important to understand that our pain is not an irrational spasm. We should start to listen to it and figure out what it’s trying to say. When someone is in extreme distress, we must stop treating the symptoms; symptoms are messengers to deeper problems. So let’s get to the deeper problem.
There are things that are within your control: what you eat, what you drink, the exercise you do, your sleeping pattern, the company you keep. Each of these things creates an internal change in the physiology of your body, as much positively as negatively. But the most important thing to maintain mental fitness is how you talk to yourself. No one is born using the harsh, critical vocabulary we use on ourselves today. We live in a society which is overexposed to ‘fake perfection’. We compare ourselves; we are constantly being told from the outside that we are not good enough, smart enough, attractive enough – and we are accepting these values and repeating them to ourselves.
The way we live today is causing huge disconnection from real, meaningful values. Just as more and more of us are eating junk food and making ourselves physically sick, many of us are consuming junk values which are making us emotionally sick. The race to be perfect – whether that be what we own, how we look, who our friends are– has no finishing line. In fact when we get closer to the finishing line it is moved further away. It is the hamster wheel of consumer happiness. And as a result, we become our own worst critic.
Stop being your own worst critic. You are allowed to make mistakes, but you are not allowed to punish and beat up your own body for being human. Become alert to how often you criticise yourself – when you do that you are physically and chemically withering your own self-esteem.
Don’t wait for others to praise you either. We all have a missing part waiting to hear something such as: “You are a good son/daughter, you are smart, you are loveable, I’m proud of you, you are enough.” Make a list of all things you wanted your parents to say to you, your teacher to say to you, your friends or coaches to say to you, your loving partner to say to you, and start saying those things to yourself. Start praising yourself. Start letting praise in. Make praise familiar and make criticism unfamiliar.