Talking the same Language

Tamsin couldn' t make herself heard, until she met a blast from the past¼

First dates are awkward enough at the best of times, but when the couple in question don' t speak the same language, the situation can be doubly difficult.

Tamsin Stevens glanced at her watch for the umpteenth time. Dale was running late. The pair had communicated via a dating website for the past month and had arranged to meet that evening, but Tamsin was beginning to wonder if Dale had changed his mind.

She was just considering sending him a text when he finally arrived.

On the plus side, Dale was very easy on the eye. On the minus side, it was clear that he hadn' t bothered reading Tamsin' s dating profile, as it quickly became apparent that he didn' t realise she had a hearing impairment and spoke British Sign Language.

Dale chatted away oblivious for nearly 10 minutes before he sensed something might be amiss.

You' re very quiet,' he eventually said. Is anything wrong?'

Tamsin signed: No, I' m fine.'

Oh, you' re¼' Dale trailed off, unsure how to respond.

Tamsin sighed and resorted to writing her reply on the notepad that she carried with her.

I have a hearing impairment, which means I find speaking difficult, so I prefer to use sign language.

Dale responded to this revelation by proceeding to do enough talking for both of them.

Tamsin wouldn' t have minded had Dale not solely focussed on the topic that he clearly loved talking about most himself.

It soon reached the point where Tamsin wondered when Dale was going to draw breath. She was tired of smiling and nodding politely. She also developed a sneaking suspicion that matters would have been no different if she didn' t have a hearing impairment.

When they parted, at the end of the evening, Dale promised that he would message Tamsin the next day.

It came as no surprise to Tamsin, however, that she never heard from him again.

Sadly, it wasn' t only dating that Tamsin found problematic. Very few aspects of adult life were straightforward.

Tamsin often looked back on her early school days with a sense of nostalgia. Life had been so much simpler.

At primary school, most of the other children were fascinated by Tamsin' s ability to communicate with her hands.

Paul Johnson not only learnt a smattering of British Sign Language, he was so enthusiastic, he even invented a handful of signs.

When he bumped his fists together, then his thumbs together, then linked his thumbs, it meant that he regarded Tamsin as his best friend.

Alas, Paul' s parents moved abroad when he was 10. Subsequently, Tamsin lost touch with him, although she thought about him often.

Whereas at primary school most children had been curious and helpful, at secondary school, Tamsin' s peers were a different breed.

No longer did her condition fascinate her fellow classmates. Many deliberately avoided her and the odd one even teased Tamsin. To make matters worse, cliques began to form and who wanted a girl with a hearing impairment in their clique?

Thankfully, Tamsin had a handful of good friends who helped to see her through the tough times, but when she reached sixth form, another issue arose dating.

For a time, Tamsin tried to ignore the fact that most of her friends had boyfriends, but when she reached university, the situation was impossible to ignore any longer. So Tamsin went on a few dates.

Although some of these were quite enjoyable, Tamsin never sensed that any of the men she went out with took her seriously, until she met Neil Fairbridge.

Neil was charming and considerate, and due to the fact that one of his cousins had a hearing impairment, he knew a smattering of British Sign Language.

This helped their burgeoning relationship enormously, and in no time at all, Tamsin and Neil became an item.

By the time their respective courses ended, Tamsin was beginning to wonder if they might be an item for life ÐÐ then Neil ran off with his physiotherapist.

Paul was so enthusiastic, he even invented a handful of signs to show he was her best friend

So much for happy endings, Tamsin thought.

It took Tamsin months to get over the break-up, but on the anniversary of her separation

from Neil, she decided that it was time to take the plunge once more.

Having heard glowing reports about one particular dating website, Tamsin took out a sixth-month subscription.

Unfortunately, the dating website wasn' t really working for her. Besides her disastrous date with Dale, numerous email exchanges began promisingly, only to peter out all too quickly.

Tamsin did go on a couple of dates with one of the temps at the local library where she worked, but that brief relationship ended when he secured a permanent post in the Shetland Islands.

Although she realised that her job wasn' t everything, Tamsin loved working at the library. She enjoyed all aspects of her job, bar one

covering the enquiries desk. She disliked working there, because most people who approached the desk were in a hurry.

Consequently, they didn' t wish to deal with a woman who had a hearing impairment, even though she dealt with enquiries as quickly and efficiently as any other member of staff.

Tamsin' s boss, Sandra, knew Tamsin didn' t enjoy working on the enquiry desk, so tried to avoid asking her to cover it. Alas, during a nasty influenza epidemic, the day arrived when the library was so short staffed, Sandra was left with little choice.

I know how much you dislike it,' Sandra said. But would you mind covering the enquiry desk today?'

Of course I don' t mind,' Tamsin signed in reply.

Thanks, Tamsin,' Sandra said. You' re a star.'

Tamsin smiled and tried to keep a positive frame of mind as she strode towards the dreaded desk.

The shift that followed was one of the busiest the library had ever experienced.

Tamsin was swamped with enquiries from the moment she took up her post.

Despite the deluge of enquiries, Tamsin survived relatively unscathed. But as seven o' clock approached, she realised there were still a number of books scattered around the desk top all of which needed stacking on the returns trolley before the library closed.

Subsequently, when the final visitor of the day approached the desk, Tamsin was only half concentrating as she was so busy stacking the trolley.

Much to her surprise, rather than address her verbally, the person standing at the desk addressed her in sign language.

The only problem was, Tamsin didn' t recognise the signs he used.

Pardon?' she signed in response, before placing another handful of books on the trolley.

The person making the enquiry repeated the baffling sign. Unsure how to respond, Tamsin asked him to repeat the gesture once more. Obligingly, he did so.

Only then did Tamsin recognise the sign. Laughing, she bumped her fists together, then her thumbs together, then linked her thumbs.

The man smiled.

Paul!' Tamsin signed. I didn' t recognise you, it' s been so long.'

As the years melted away, Tamsin' s hands sprang to life, and in a blur of movement, she asked: How are you? What are you up to these days? When did you return?'

Sorry,' Paul replied in British Sign Language, only I' m a bit¼' He trailed off, having forgotten how to sign the word he required.

Tamsin hazarded a guess. Rusty?'

Yes,' Paul said, laughing. Tamsin found herself laughing too. She was about to ask Paul how she could assist him when the lights suddenly dimmed.

Is the library closing?' Paul asked.

Yes,' Tamsin signed.

Maybe I could come back tomorrow and we could carry on the conversation then?'

Deciding to take a chance, in response, Tamsin signed: Well, you could do that or you could take me for a drink this evening, then we can chat for as long as we like.'

That sounds like an excellent Ikea,' Paul signed. Ikea?'

Sorry, I meant idea!'

Tamsin grinned. You are rusty.'

Told you,' Paul signed, then he carefully added: I think I need a few lessons. Would you know anyone who would be happy to teach me?'

Tamsin smiled and replied: I know just the girl.'

As the years melted away, TamsinÕ s hands sprang to life , and she asked: When did you return?Õ