Alone in the snow

Alison thought she' d lost her husband, until he appeared just when she needed him

Alison checked her watch and jumped to her feet. Everyone else had left the office ages ago and she' d lost all track of time.

A gust of wind rattled the door and when she looked out of the window, she saw the other side of the High Street was in total darkness.

The snow which had been no more than a flurry when everyone else headed home had turned into a blizzard.

That' s all I need,' she muttered.

Or maybe it was a blessing in disguise. She had the perfect excuse to stay at the office all night. She doubted Nik would notice if she didn' t come home. He' d probably be relieved.

Her shoulders slumped. It was coming to something when the prospect of a night sleeping in a chair at the office was preferable to going home.

Nik spent all day every day sprawled out on the sofa either watching television or playing games on his phone. Lately he didn' t even bother to eat, even if she left something for him.

She couldn' t help him while he refused to help himself.

He' d turned down counselling and stopped taking the medication the doctor had prescribed and she was furious with him for that.

It was wrong to get angry with him. He' d had a breakdown. It wasn' t his fault. But it wasn' t hers either and she was worried sick about him.

I just want my husband back, she thought. But he' d gone and sometimes she feared she' d lost him for good.

Guilt piled in on top of the snow. He used to be a lorry driver and loved his job until the accident. People had died and he blamed himself, even though it wasn' t his fault.

He hadn' t been involved, but had witnessed the whole thing.

The pile-up had closed the motorway for 18 hours, that' s how bad it was.

He' d tried to get back behind the wheel of his beloved car, the one he' d spent two years doing up, but every time he did, he' d start to sweat and his breathing would become rapid and shallow.

At times Alison was terrified he was having a heart attack.

After a while he' d given up trying to drive. The haulage company were good, but they said they couldn' t keep his job open forever.

She was about to call Nik to let him know she wouldn' t be home, when the lights went out. She couldn' t stay in the building with no heat and no light. She had no choice but to go home. She used the torch on her phone to help find her coat and bag, then locked up the office and slipped and slithered her way to the

God, she missed him. She couldn't remember the last time they'd laughed about anyt hing

car park.

If she fell and broke her leg, she may well end up dead in the snow and tears stung her eyes when she realised Nik probably wouldn' t care.

Her car was the only one in the car park and as soon as she brushed the snow off the windscreen it was replaced by more. Her fingers were so cold they hurt and it felt as if ice was crawling up her legs. It was tempting to just sit on the ground and let the snow cover her.

But what would happen to Nik if she did that? She couldn' t abandon him.

A couple of years ago she' d been snowed in at work, dreading the drive home, but as she left the office Nik pulled up outside.

Her boss Carol had whistled. What a beauty,' she said, then laughed and gave Alison a nudge. And the car' s not bad either.'

It was an American classic with gleaming chrome and huge tail fins and it looked spectacular in the snow.

Your knight in shining armour,' Carol said. But wow, what a car!'

It had really felt like he' d come to her rescue as she climbed into the welcome warmth and sank into the soft seat.

You didn' t mind me coming to get you did you?' he' d said. It' s not that I don' t think you' re capable, but I know you hate driving in the snow and I' m more used to it than you.'

She' d reached out and cupped his face in her hands and kissed him, long and hard.

Yeah, I' m really mad,' she' d laughed.

OK, well jump out and I' ll see you at home.'

Nah, you' re all right. I' ve done my seat belt up now.'

God, she missed him. She couldn' t remember the last time they' d laughed about anything.

It took ages with the engine running and the fans on full blast before the windows cleared enough to drive safely.

She checked her phone before setting off. There were no messages from Nik telling her to drive carefully. She had to face the truth. He was so lost in his own pain that she didn' t figure in his thoughts any more.

The wheels slid and she gripped the steering wheel tight. There was no traffic on the road and all the lights were out even the traffic lights.

She let out a sob when she was carefully crossing at the junction and another car sped across her front, almost hitting her. He blasted on his horn as he passed.

Her legs were already shaking and she hadn' t even left town.

The country roads were worse. Narrow and winding and with such a build-up of snow, there was just enough room to drive down the centre. If someone came the other way, she' d be stuffed. She couldn' t reverse back and there were very few places suitable for passing.

She' d only gone two miles when she stopped and groped for her phone. Maybe if she called Nik and told him how scared she was, he could talk her through it. She wouldn' t feel so alone if she could hear his voice through her headphones. It might even bring them closer together. She felt better just hearing his phone ring, but eventually it went through to his messaging service. She tried three more times before she threw the phone into the foot well and thumped the steering wheel with her fists.

Just as she thought he wasn' t even worried. He' d probably left his phone charging while he got engrossed in something on telly, one of those shows he was obsessed with about makeovers and new starts. But wasn' t she partly to blame for this? She should have been more patient, should have shown more sympathy, should have made him see the doctor again.

She thought of her harsh words to him that morning as she left for work.

Don' t over exert yourself will you!'

What?' He' d looked up at her with those hopeless blue eyes.

It wouldn' t hurt you to get dressed, Nik,' she said. Push the Shark round, empty the dishwasher.'

He' d looked at the dishwasher and blinked as if it had never occurred to him.

I' m sick of doing everything round here,' she said. You' re blaming yourself for something that wasn' t your fault and I' m the one suffering for it.'

You weren' t there,' he said, his voice dull and lifeless. You didn' t see what I saw. And there was nothing I could do.'

You' ll find your misery is a very lonely companion when that' s all you' ve got left because you' ve driven everyone else away!'

Why had she said such a horrible thing? Because she was worried about him, trying to shock him back to life. So many people had stopped visiting because they couldn' t handle his grief and no one knew what to say to him.

Please let him be all right,' she sobbed. I' ll try harder. I will. I' ll be better.'

With tears running down her face, she set off again, slowly making her way through the driving snow, noticing how the pile on one side of the road was getting bigger and bigger as the wind drove it across.

It took her 20 minutes to drive three more miles. Thankfully she didn' t see any traffic at all coming towards her, but she was aware it could

happen at any time.

Her shoulders and neck ached and she had pins and needles in her hands from gripping the steering wheel. When she came round a long bend she was faced with rows of red lights and blue and red flashes lighting up the snow.

She could see police cars, ambulances and a fire engine.

There was no way she' d get through and no way she could turn round either. No wonder nothing had come the other way.

The road was blocked. A man got out of the car in front and came towards her.

What' s happened?' she asked.

Car went off the road,' he said. Someone further down the queue said there' s an old American car involved. Bit of a classic by the sound of it, tail fins the lot. Shame. Hey, are you OK?'

Red?'

Yeah, I think so. I can' t see much from back here and the police have told us to stay in our vehicles. At least until they' ve put the fire out. Why?'

Fire?!'

She pushed her door open and started towards the scene of the accident. The guy caught her arm.

No, wait. They said to stay back,' he said.

She shrugged his hand off. How many American classic cars could there be round here? Another guy got out of his car as she passed.

Best stay in your car, Miss,' he said.

What is wrong with people?' she heard a woman say. Why would you want to go and gawp at an accident? Ghoul!'

She could see the hi-vis jackets of the emergency services and someone saw her approaching and came to head her off.

Let me through!' she cried. It' s my husband' s car.' She could see it now, gleaming red in all the lights, snow building up across the windscreen.

The policeman spoke into his radio. Woman here says it' s her husband. Yeah. Can she ride in the ambulance?'

Ambulance? Is he very badly hurt?' she asked.

He took her arm and stopped her falling over on the compacted snow. There were two ambulances and she saw them loading a trolley into the back of one.

Nik!' she cried. Nik! I' m here. I' m sorry. Please be all right.'

She stepped up into the ambulance and looked at the patient.

No,' she backed away.

That' s not my husband.'

It didn' t look like a car thief either. The patient was middle-aged with grey streaked hair. Maybe Nik had sold his precious car? He hadn' t driven it since the accident and as far as she knew, he hadn' t even been in his workshop to look at it. Is he going to be all right?' Should be,' the paramedic said. It could have been so much worse.'

As the ambulance doors shut and it drove off, her legs gave way and she almost fell, but strong hands grabbed her and held her up. She felt stupid, frightened and cold and so very alone.

Alison! Are you all right?' Nik?'

His arms tightened around her.

There was a smear of blood on his face and his jacket was torn.

Are you hurt?'

I' m fine,' he said. I was in the other ambulance. They checked me out. A few bruises, that' s all.'

Another accident,' she whispered. Oh, Nik.'

I wasn' t involved. The weather looked bad so I thought I' d come and pick you up, but I saw a car had gone off the road and stopped to see if I could help.'

He waved his hand at smashed down bushes and a fallen tree with a burnt out car buried in the snow.

One of the police officers said: If your husband hadn' t stopped to help, the driver would have died. He got him out seconds before the car caught fire.'

You' re a hero, Nik,' she whispered.

No,' he said.

The police reopened the road and Nik walked Alison back to her car.

Will you be all right to drive home? I' ll be right behind you.'

I' ll be fine knowing you' re there,' she said.

I tried starting the car a couple of months ago, but there was something wrong and I' ve been working on it for the past few weeks. I didn' t say anything because I thought you' d be annoyed I was doing that instead of washing up or working.'

Oh, Nik. I' ve been so horrible.'

You' ve been scared and worried,' he said. That' s all. Everything will be all right now, I promise.'

She drove him back to his car and the police stopped the traffic so he could turn round and follow her. She could see his lights in her rear view mirror and realised she wasn' t alone any more.

It had been a long, difficult journey, but they' d come through it. Nik had taken a massive step today and she had too. There' d be no more struggling alone, from now on they were going to move forward together.

Her legs gave way and she almost fell, but strong hands grabbed her and held her up