The surrogate

Jade' s unborn baby had disappeared. Now she was in a race against time¼

Jade rang the bell of flat 11. Feeling lighthearted today, she wore a smile on her face. Soon she' d have a bouncing baby to cherish, after years of trying to have children.

Sometimes dreams do come true, she thought as the door opened and young Kat stared out at her.

Is Leeza ready? We' re going shopping.'

The girl, a university student, and a slip of a thing, frowned. I' m not really sure where she is. I woke up this morning and she' d gone.

She doesn' t have a lecture and, well, some of her clothes are missing and some of my money. Oh, and my car! She did leave an IOU. I tried calling, but her phone' s turned off.'

Jade pushed by and entered the somewhat ramshackle flat. Neither young woman excelled at keeping the place tidy.

Martin, her other half, sent in a cleaner once a fortnight.

She can clear out the fridge,' he' d explained. Just to be safe. We don' t want Leeza poisoning herself with food beyond its sell-by-date. She could also check she' s taking her vitamins.'

He did tend to sound like a character out of Orwell' s Nineteen Eighty-Four sometimes.

Then again, their surrogate had a habit of eating burgers and skipping breakfast.

A friend of a friend had introduced them. Afterwards they' d spent a great deal of time getting to know Leeza Garret from Manchester.

She was studying English, and although it was against the law for them to pay for her services, they could offer money for expenses cash that would help her finish her education.

Emotionally, she' d seemed mature¸ the whole idea of becoming a human incubator simply a business transaction. She' d share no genetic material with their little one. Leeza jokingly called herself the cooker.''

Now Jade' s chest tightened and she struggled to breathe.

She' s not supposed to go anywhere without telling us.'

Kat' s lips puckered into the shape of a cat' s behind.

Sorry, I forgot to chain her to a radiator. Maybe she' s done a runner. I wouldn' t blame her, though your deal did come with a few benefits.'

She gave Jade a raking glare from her head to her toes and said: A taxi service, a stylist, a minder.' Her lip curled. I mean, you know¼'

Jade' s stomach roiled. She decided to ignore the slight.

Do you have any idea where Leeza might have gone?''

Not the foggiest. I know¼¼ go hire a private detective! Only, I expect you have already. I bet you know her background inside out.'

Jade ignored the girl one more time. Usually with

Leeza about, Kat kept her own counsel.

She pushed past again, heading for Leeza' s bedroom.

Inside, clothes littered the carpet and make-up lay strewn across the dresser. The duvet looked like an origami expert had suffered a fit of pique.

How could you tell anything' s missing?'

Kat huffed. Because she' s the size of an elephant now

and all her big stuff is gone.'

Jade started to search, looking for clues to the girl' s whereabouts. Meanwhile

Kat stood by with her arms crossed.

Aren' t you going to call your husband?'

I can' t. He has a very important meeting this morning. And besides, he didn' t want to pick Leeza. I talked him into it. I wanted her to have an easier time of it getting her degree.'

Bar the morning sickness, the heartburn, the aches and pains and one agonising birth?' Kat sneered. My mum' s like you she thinks she can buy anything as well.'

Jade' s rebuttal died on her lips. Arguing felt pointless.

I need to know that

Leeza'' s OK. You'' re her best friend, she must have given you some idea of her plans. Please¼

Jade' s voice broke as she tried and failed to keep her composure.

The girl' s face, rock-hard, lacked all sympathy.

She might be trying to find her own mother.'

Jade blinked. They had paid for an expensive background check. Leeza' s mother had disappeared not long after the girl' s birth, leaving her father and his family to bring her up.

Oh lor¼' She turned for the door.

Kat, on her heels, yapped like a dog. Do you know where her mum lives? I bet you do.'

The girl trailed her right into the corridor, right down the stairs too. Outside she trotted in her wake all the way across the car park.

When Jade aimed her key fob at her car and it beeped its usual cheery hello, Kat opened the passenger door.

What are you doing?' Jade demanded.

I' m coming with you.'

You can' t. Her mother lives on a sheep farm in

Wales in the middle of nowhere. It' ll be a three-hour trip with no guarantee Leeza is anywhere near the place.'

But you' re going anyway, aren' t you?'

Why don' t you stay here in case she comes back?'

Kat pulled her mobile out of the rear pocket of her jeans. Don' t worry, I' ve got loads of friends who can keep an eye out. I warned most of them this morning, so we might as well just get going.''

Her mum really lives on a sheep farm?'

hour later, Kat broke the silence as the straightbacked, prim and proper

Jade drove her BMW down another identical stretch of motorway.

The woman had to be knocking on 45. She smelt of expensive perfume, and her clothes were understated and immaculate.

Kat wondered how well she' d cope with a baby puking all over her expensive clothes. About as well as her own mother, she suspected.

What' s Leeza' s mum doing hanging around with sheep?'

Shearing, training collies? I don' t know.'

You didn' t leave any information about her lying around at your place, did you? You were always inviting Leeza over to use your pool she may have seen it.'

Kat had always refused to go on those little trips when invited by her friend.

Her own parents might not be in the pool-owning category, but they were near enough for it to grate.

These days, Kat wore her clothes until they fell to bits just to rankle her mother. Money was the route of all evil to her.

Then Kat added: Do you think she went to see her mum so they could compare notes about abandoning kids?'

Our child is not her baby, biologically,' Jade replied shortly.

Even so, she' s carried it for almost nine months. She' s formed some kind of attachment.' Kat hung on to her seat belt as the woman swerved towards an exit ramp. Where are we going?'

The service station, I need a break.'

It turned out she needed a good cry, more like.

Half an hour later, Kat stood in the antiseptically white toilets of the service station, listening in and wrinkling her nose at the scent of bleach.

Jade had left her sitting over a cup of builder' s tea out in the café for so long, she' d wondered if, like

Leeza, she' d disappeared.

She' d gone into the loos and heard sobs. They could only be coming from one person. Now she stood studying her dispassionate expression in the mirror behind the sinks.

She tried hard to mimic her mother the psycho, the narcissist. If something didn' t revolve around her, it didn' t exist.

Her mime dropped as her shoulders sagged. Jade, are you OK?' Yes.' How could one word quiver so much?

You can always pay somebody else to have a baby for you.'

The woman' s cubicle door opened and then closed with a slam as Jade exited.

We' re talking about a child not a coat with a rip. What kind of monster are you?'

Kat saw her own eyes widen in

the glass. She had dropped that impression of her mother, hadn' t she?

Jade left in a rush and she hurried to keep up. What I meant was¼'

I know precisely what you meant, Katrina.'

Back at the car, as Kat belted herself in, she glanced at her companion' s face.

Wiping her eyes, the woman had removed most of her eyeshadow and all of her foundation.

Kat' s mother would never have dared to let the world see her face so naked. So full of emotion¼ So afraid.

I'm like my mum, aren't I? Kat thought. Armoured. I know what Mum's like underneath, but what am I?

`Are you all right?' Jade asked Kat as the sun climbed higher in the sky.

They now passed road signs in Welsh, long and impossible for a non-native to read. She' d copied into her satnav the address her private investigator had supplied in a folder she kept in the glove compartment.

Had Leeza ever taken a look in there? She' d often taken the girl out, treating her to clothes and nutritious groceries. She' d left her alone sometimes, while picking up dry-cleaning.

I said, are you all right?' she repeated to the silent, brooding Kat.

Yeah, I s' pose¼ I' m thinking.'

Good. Think about why Leeza' s acting so out of character.'

Honestly,' the girl gave her a long study. I think it' s all your fault.'

The satnav interrupted, telling Jade to make another turn, taking them deeper into the countryside.

Rolling hills and sheep, dotted all over the grass like fallen blossom, surrounded them on each side.

What did you find out about her mum?' Kat asked.

She moved to Wales. Met somebody else and had another family. Two boys.' Just like that?' I doubt it was just like that, but I don' t have the whole story.'

The car snaked around a bend and as the road straightened, Kat shrieked and pointed: There' s my car!'

It sat tucked on to the verge. Jade could see somebody in the driver' s seat. She parked right behind the girl' s little run-around, Kat making a dash for it before she' d even turned off the engine.

Why didn' t you tell me where you were going?' she yelled, banging on the passenger door window. What are you playing at?'

Jade unclipped her seat belt and climbed out too, only then she froze as Kat yelled: She' s having the baby!'

Jade panicked two weeks early! She rummaged in her bag for her mobile, but there was no signal.

Mind whirring, she ran for the other car. Reaching the driver' s side, she pulled the door open.

There, lost Leeza sat a girl with warm brown hair and olive skin, just like her husband Martin. Another reason for their choice.

I' m so glad that you' re here!' said Leeza as she reached for Jade' s hand and hung on tight. I feel like I need to push, but I couldn' t ring anybody...'

She nodded towards a bend where a farm house sat back from the road.

We can' t deliver a baby!' said Kat, sounding hysterical.

It' s all right,' Jade soothed. We know somebody with some experience of lambing at least.'

No, no!' Leeza gasped. I changed my mind about seeing her. I don' t want to. This was a stupid idea.'

Jade leant close and spoke to the girl gently.

Then we won' t tell her, will we? You don' t have to. You can still meet her and she' ll be none the wiser. What choice do we have?

Can you get out? I' ll need to drive¼ Kat, take my car.'

Kat followed in the tyre tracks of her own car, heart hammering, perspiration on her brow.

Her earlier panic refused to die down. Without Jade' s calming presence earlier, her head might have exploded.

Some people excelled in a crisis, while Kat tended to scream and yell.

Now she breathed deeply, whispering to herself: Calm down, calm down. It' s fine. Jade' s in charge.'

How comforting that suddenly sounded.

She trailed the other vehicle until both cars entered a straw-strewn yard, chickens scattering as a collie came hurtling out of a doorway, barking.

Kat stayed in her seat while Jade climbed out to face the dog. Then Leeza' s actual mother appeared.

A thick-set woman, she wore oversized brown trousers, wellies and a T-shirt.

The two women spoke and then Jade waved towards the house, before hurrying back to help Leeza out of the car.

That' s when Kat climbed out to lend a hand.

It' s her it' s Abby, your mum. She' s here alone. Her family' s up in the hills with the stock,' she heard Jade tell her friend as she joined them.

She says you' ll be best off

in her lounge. She' s gone to ring for an ambulance, but she' ll lay out bedding and towels, just in case. She says she' s birthed a million lambs.'

Leeza reached out a hand and grabbed hold of Kat' s, her death grip cutting off

Kat' s blood supply. Don' t say anything about me.'

I won' t.'

We' ll still need a cover story,' Jade cut in. So you left looking for your other half, he' s disappeared, and he has family in the area. We came looking for you. That' ll do for now. I doubt we' ll have much time for chitchat.'

Together, they helped the lumbering, wincing Leeza inside. In a cosy lounge with a huge brick fireplace and wooden beams above their heads, they laid her down on a makeshift nest of duvets and pillows.

She clung on to them both as Abby, all unknowing, smiled.

Is this your first?' she asked, her cheeks ruddy and wind-blown.

Leeza nodded.

You' ll be fine. It' s natural to be scared, I was with my first. I was far too young to cope.' Her gaze grew wistful. But that' s another story.'

Tell it!' Kat blurted. She blinked then under the gaze of them all. I mean¼ why not?' she added awkwardly as Leeza' s nails cut into her flesh, the grip on her hand still like a vice.

Maybe later,' Abby frowned as Leeza began to wail. I don' t think we have long, but I need to take a look and check.'

When Leeza finally let go of her hand, Kat backed off at speed. It was clear now that her friend didn' t have time to wait for an ambulance.

Unnerved, Kat dashed into the hallway. Following it, she found herself in the kitchen and leant over the sink, nausea rising.

That' s when Jade walked in. What are we doing here?' Kat asked her .`T his is insane.'

Kids are never on a timetable. They tend to do things whenever they' re ready.'

Oh, you' re an expert now, are you? You don' t even have kids.'

`` Actually, I feel like I have at least two right now, and one on the way. Your friend needs you, so get back in there and stop thinking of yourself for once.'

I don t think about myself. '' Right, that' s why you' re hiding, and all that silence on the way over meant nothing. I know you' re afraid ÐÐ we all are.'

Unexpectedly, that' s when the woman gathered up Kat in her arms, as if using her body to press all the scattering pieces of her back together.

This was all your fault,'

Kat repeated as they parted. You' ve been like a mother to Leeza, as weird as that sounds under the circumstances. That' s why she kept thinking of her own mother that' s why she came here.'

Jade didn' t look at all surprised by her confession. Why would she, bearing in mind the sudden hug that Kat had needed so much?

From the lounge Leeza screamed: Jade! Kat! The baby' s coming. Where are you?'

We' re coming,' Kat replied with grim determination.

Jade was the third person to hold her newborn daughter that afternoon, after Abby, who delivered her, and Leeza who lay with her in her arms in an exhausted stupor.

Lily Harriet (after Jade' s mother) Cooper was born at 3.15pm. On her head sprouted tufts of brown hair, and she looked out on to the world with clear blue eyes.

Jade cradled her as she sat in a lounge chair, all of them waiting for the paramedics to arrive. Apparently, the ambulance was delayed, due to a rock fall of all things. Only in the countryside...

Jade gazed into her baby' s face, seeing Martin and echoes of herself. Their child all theirs. Every cell.

That story of yours, Abby,' she said in distracted tones, not really feeling attached to the earth any more, lost to bliss. I have a story too four miscarriages and one stillbirth.'

Oh, love,' Abby breathed. Jade left her a length of silence to fill.

Neither of the girls said a word Leeza, wrapped in a dressing gown, lying on the settee by now, with Kat on the carpet by her side.

I couldn' t cope with my first,' Abby confessed. So young and stupid, I didn' t know one end of her from the other. I left her with her nan, who hated every inch of me, and her dad.'

Tears shone in her eyes. I should have gone back, but I didn' t feel like I' d do her much good. I did some silly things back then with drink and drugs. Once I' d sorted myself out, it felt too late.

I wish I could tell her I love her now. I wish I had the courage to explain, but how do you say yes, I handed you over. I gave you up?'

She wiped at her eyes. Across the void between them, Leeza reached out.

I have a story as well,' she said. It' s an odd one, but I' d like to tell it now. You see, I just had Jade' s baby. She' s not mine. I think in some weird way, I needed to know what it felt like to let go¼'

Jade held on to her daughter tightly as Leeza continued. She meant to explain it all as best she could. It would be hard and heart-wrenching, and Jade wouldn' t let her do it alone.

She shared a glance with Kat, feeling responsible for both young women now.

She couldn' t deny what the girl had said earlier.

This was all her fault. Martin often said the same: You mother everybody, from me to the builders we had in, to the milkman, to the paper boy. You mother the entire world.'

I do, she thought, I do. I can't seem to stop looking after everyone. Not that I'v e ever minded.

As tears of happiness welled, she gazed into Lily' s eyes and whispered: It is wonderful, though, to finally have a baby of my own.'

YouÕ ll be fine. It s natural to be scared, I was with my first. I was far too young to copeÕ