Don’t let caring for a loved one take its toll on your health

If you’re looking after someone with dementia, take time to look after yourself

A simple phone call can help

Depression and exhaustion are common for those caring for loved ones with dementia – so putting your own needs first isn’t selfish, it’s essential.

Dementia rates are believed to be on the rise, with about 850,000 people in the UK already diagnosed with some form of the condition.

The number of people “living with” dementia, however, is far higher. Because, as with many conditions, it isn’t an illness that only impacts the person who actually has it.

Dementia affects those around them too, especially the spouses, partners and relatives who become carers for their loved one, as the recent tragic case of Meryl and Michael Parry – who killed his wife and later himself, reportedly after struggling to cope with her dementia – highlights.

Extreme cases like this are rare but it’s important – as carers, medical professionals and as a society – to be aware of carers’ needs and know that support is just as vital as diagnosis.

Recent research by Alzheimer’s Society revealed that most GPs believe their patients with dementia have to rely on families and unpaid carers.

“While there are positive aspects of caring, such as learning new skills, strengthening relationships and supporting someone who is important to you, it can also be both physically and mentally exhausting,” says George McNamara, head of policy and public affairs at Alzheimer’s Society.

“Sadly, it can be common for carers to struggle and many experience stress and depression,” adds Susan Drayton, clinical lead for Admiral Nursing DIRECT at Dementia UK.

“Dementia can still have negative connotations and many people are unaware of the support and services available. Older carers can also have their own complex physical and emotional needs, which can add to the challenges of caring for a spouse with dementia.”

Just acknowledging that being a carer can be challenging and that it’s normal to find it a struggle at times, can make a big difference to people but actual support is also very important.

“A simple phone call to a specialist can help carers feel less isolated.” says Susan.

It’s important that carers don’t neglect their own health while caring for a loved one with dementia.