Bare legs in winter? Get away with you fashionistas

Noooooooo! News reaches me from planet fashion that we are being urged to embrace the bare legs trend this autumn/winter, rather than covering up in a sturdy pair of opaques – or better still, woollen tights. For pity’s sake, this is the one thing I look forward to during those ridiculous summer months when we’re urged to exfoliate, bronze and depilate our poor pins.

I can actually have rather lovely daydreams while reclining on a sun lounger under blazing sunshine, thinking about soft tweed trews and knee-high boots when the nights start drawing in.

Thankfully, these edicts from planet fashion tend to pass me by once I’ve had a good scoff at their ridiculous and vacuous nature (while wearing something comfortable and I like to think timelessly classic – OK, more than 20 years old).

But when it comes to threatening our winter coverups, I feel personally affronted.

Apart from the fact that not all of us have the kind of legs we like to draw attention to, can I be the only person of a certain age who still suffers wee bruises and grazes from everyday life on their knees?

Half the time, I look like I’ve fallen over in the playground at break time. No one wants to see that.

For this reason, tights need to be nice and thick – for protection as well as comfort.

Talking of protection – Hello? Scotland? In winter? Nae tights? Please. Hospital admissions would go through the roof by Christmas.

It might be practical for those fashionistas who are whisked from heated car to front row and back into heated car but for the rest of us it’s downright reckless.

As we’re on the subject of hosiery, can we just take a minute to reflect on the virtues of a good sock. How lovely is it when you find the perfect pair that will stay up in a pair of ankle boots?

Or better still – soft woollen socks you can wear indoors when it’s not too cold to have the heating on but not warm enough to go bare-footed. A cashmere bedsock? Now that’s my kind of pillow talk.

Scotland? In winter? Nae tights? Hospital admissions would go through the roof