The Courier & Advertiser (Perth and Perthshire Edition)

Incomprehe­nsible

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“When on holiday abroad, I like to try to work out the nationalit­y of other holidaymak­ers by their speech,” says a Perth reader. “French, German and Spanish give me no trouble, but, on one occasion, I was flummoxed by a family group following behind me along the promenade of a Spanish resort.

“I could not work out where they came from at all, perhaps the Netherland­s or Norway or Sweden, I thought.

“Then the mystery group came alongside and I heard them more clearly. They were Scots! Their brogue was so strong that they were almost incomprehe­nsible to me, a born and bred Dundonian.

“Another time on a Spanish courtesy bus to the market, a Scottish family came aboard and the father utterly bamboozled the non-English-speaking Spanish driver – and me too, almost – with the request: ‘Geeza shout when wu git tae the merket!’

“Mind you, the bus driver perhaps caught the Scotsman’s drift with the word ‘merket’, since it is very near the Spanish ‘mercado’.”

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