Fe­bru­ary 2019

The Daily Telegraph - Telegraph Magazine - - Just Williams -

May now com­mu­ni­cates solely via in­ter­pre­ta­tive dance, which makes her ap­prox­i­mately 80 per cent more ar­tic­u­late, 40 per cent more like­able and 100 per cent fun­nier. In day-to-day life, a se­nior civil ser­vant armed with a boom box fol­lows her ev­ery­where; at Prime Min­is­ter’s Ques­tions, it is left to Gavin Wil­liamson to beat­box dur­ing her an­swers, and Brexit ne­go­ti­a­tions are moved to the Moulin Rouge. Stumped on the ques­tion of how to re­move her, the 1922 Com­mit­tee ar­ranges a dance-off in lieu of a lead­er­ship bat­tle. The PM beats all com­ers, but the com­mit­tee has an ace up its sleeve: sneak­ing him through the for­mal process, they bribe Ed Balls to switch sides, make him a life peer, and watch as he de­stroys May at hus­tings.

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