‘He claimed to be a widower. He told you music got him through the difficult times’

sent me reams of WhatsApp messages and emails between the two of you, which made for heartbreaking reading. He claimed to be a widower, who was unable to have children, and you poured your hearts out to each other. He told you music had got him through the difficult times, and he sent you romantic songs including Perfect by Ed Sheeran and Once in a Lifetime by Craig David. As you absorbed the lyrics, time and again, your emotions intensified. Besotted with this man, you would have done anything to get him back from Dubai and into your arms.

In one email on July 5, you opened up, saying: “You seem to have invaded my whole existence. I’m thinking about you constantly, you’re in my heart and on my mind every moment of the day, but l wouldn’t have it any other way. To be honest, l never thought l’d meet anyone who could sweep me off my feet like you’ve done. Be in no doubt my commitment to you will be forever.” It was shortly after this that the scammer decided you were ready to be extorted out of practically every penny you had.

On July 17 the first transfer was made, and you continued making them until Sept 6. In total you sent 31 payments to him. During this time you say you received five generic written fraud alerts from HSBC, but you say they meant nothing to you.

However, when I asked HSBC it said you were shown customer warnings for every transaction you carried out. HSBC also said it spoke to you nine times on the phone to discuss payments, in addition to a separate telephone conversation covering a number of payments. While it seemed you believed what you were telling HSBC, there were instances where it said you were not always entirely transparent about the payments.

At one point you referred to the scammer as your “husband”, and when questioned directly, stated that you had met him in person and had a long-standing relationship with him.

So although you still feel let down by the bank, it’s fair to say it might have been able to protect you better, had you been completely truthful.

HSBC then spent weeks thoroughly reviewing your case, including hundreds of messages between you and the scammer. After just a few days it refunded a sum of £3,000 into your account. This was funds it had been able to recover from the fraudster, it said, although it was only 1pc of the overall money you lost.

But then, several weeks later, HSBC informed you of its life-changing decision to provide you with a further refund of £ 307,000, covering your losses in full. This was, it said, under the contingent reimbursement model – a set of guidelines designed to protect scam victims. Under this guidance, it was refunding you due to your vulnerability, it said. I think this was the right decision, given the unique and devastating set of circumstances that led to the scam, which arose through no fault of your own.

Some reading this may struggle to understand how you can have fallen for this ruse. But none of us is foolproof, especially in the wrong circumstances. I hope that, in time, you’ll find a way to trust again.

A spokesman for HSBC said: “We are sorry to hear the customer has been the victim of a romance scam. She was presented with customer warnings for each transaction and we spoke with her nine times about different payments. We have thoroughly reviewed the matter and considered all the information to hand.

“Taking into account her vulnerability, and as a result was more susceptible to this kind of scam, we are providing her with a full refund.”