Linda Blair

Why too much choice can make us unhappy

Half-term is a time when many parents wonder how to keep their offspring engaged after the full-on schedule of term time. Apart from the need to ensure children are happily and safely occupied, is it important to give them choices about how to spend their time?

It’s true that having no choice at all is unpalatable. When offered “this or nothing”, we all feel somehow cheated, dissatisfied with what it seems we’re forced to accept. This probably goes back to our early childhood, when an important part of becoming independent includes permission to make our own choices.

That’s why, when helping parents find ways to get their children to do things they don’t want to do but that are in their best interests, I suggest they use the “forced choice option”. Instead of coaxing a child to eat the vegetable they’re given or do their homework now, for example, parents offer a choice. The trick is to make sure that all options offered are in the child’s best interests. That way, the

child feels empowered when choosing, but at the same time the parent wins whatever choice is made. So instead of “eat up your carrots”, the parent asks: “Carrots or cucumber tonight?”

If choice is a good thing, does it, however, follow that the more options we’re allowed, the happier and more satisfied we’ll feel once we’ve made our decision? Research shows the opposite is true. It seems that the more choices we’re given, the less able we are to make a decision – and if we do choose, the less satisfied we are with what we’ve selected. The research that demonstrates this has come to be known as “the jam experiment”.

In the late Nineties, researchers at Columbia University set up tasting stalls in two delicatessens. Customers in both shops were invited to taste, and then hopefully buy, a particular flavour of jam (and, in later experiments, a type of chocolate). In one shop, they were offered a choice of six, and in the other, a choice of 30 flavours. When asked, everyone said they thought that it was better to have lots of choice. However, the customers who were offered 30 choices were 10 times less likely to make a decision than were the customers who were given only six options. Furthermore, of those who did make up their mind, the ones who had 30 choices were more regretful of the decision they had made than were those offered only six choices.

It appears the relationship between choice and wellbeing isn’t simple. Some choice is important – it helps us feel more in control in our lives. Too many choices, however, will overwhelm, ultimately leading to indecision and dissatisfaction.