BRIDESMAIDS THROUGH THE AGES

I N YOUR TWENTIES

This is the best time to be a bridesmaid. You’re young, full of energy and you still look good after a vat of pinot grigio and two hours’ sleep.

Whatever you do, avoid in-house bride bitching. Ditto, complaining about the bridesmaid dress. It is not easy to flatter every bridesmaid with the right colour, shape etc. But remember the bride is probably already stressed out, and the last thing she needs is a demanding bridesmaid.

I N YOUR THIRTIES

Don’t get involved in the bouquet scrum, unless you want to get physical with all the other women (who are bound to be a decade younger). Not only will you be advertising your single status in neon lights, it’s the equivalent of screeching: “I want a husband so badly, I will do even this.”

I N YOUR F ORTIES

Weddings can be long, drawn-out affairs, and you’re a bit over it.

Indeed, some wedding nowadays are three-day marathons. Pace yourself. Bring a change of footwear. If you’ve spent hours teetering on skyscraper heels, why not change into a pair of pretty flip flops or ballet flats?

That way you can dance the night away with the twenty-somethings without slumping in a heap at the nearest table or, worse, ending up in accident and emergency.

IN YOUR FIFTIES

If you must consider the offer to be a bridesmaid, check your co-bridesmaids. If the bride has chosen her 19-year-old niece or a blonde twentysomething to walk down the aisle with you, think about the comparison. Who would relish being photographed next to a sylph-like 21-year-old in the line-up? Just say no.