Being a kept man might send you to an early grave

MEN who earn less than their wives have a greater chance of dying from heart disease, stroke and diabetes, a study suggests.

While stepping back and enjoying the benefits of a wife’s larger pay packet may seem alluring, the reality is that to do so produces unhealthy levels of stress, according to the new research.

Sociologists who carried out the study, at Rutgers University in New Jersey, said men suffered psychologically when they were toppled from a position as main provider and this had a knock-on effect on their physical health.

The research team studied nearly 2,000 couples over 30 years, monitoring changes in earnings and status.

They found much higher rates of stress-related illness as well as heart problems and diabetes in men whose earning power was eclipsed by that of their wives. The harmful effects persisted irrespective of social class, suggesting low-income earners suffer just as much as those on large salaries.

“Wives increasingly out-earn their husbands and this may undermine men’s well-being,” the researchers found.

“We found that violating cultural expectations, such as the masculine ideal of male breadwinning, is associated with older men’s poorer health.”

The findings echo previous research conducted in Denmark, which suggests that men who are married to higher-earning women are more likely to rely on Viagra than men who are the main breadwinners.

Psychologists have argued that falling short of one’s own expectations, which are largely conditioned by society, is distressing and can damage a person’s mental health.

In turn, the stress damages physical health by overburdening physiological systems, increasing the risk of conditions such as hypertension, cardiovascular disease and diabetes.

Persistent stress also suppresses the immune system, rendering an individual susceptible to infectious diseases.

Prof Cary Cooper, a psychologist from Manchester Business School, said most men still saw their role as the main provider despite the huge increase in recent decades in the numbers of wives working.

“We like to talk about the role of ‘new man’ in the family structure, spending more time with the kids and less out at work. But the fact is most men still think they should be the primary breadwinner.

“When they no longer play that role, their health suffers psychologically and that in turns damages their physical health.

“And it’s much worse if they have been made redundant. It will take generations

‘We like to talk about the role of ’new man’ … but most still think they should be the primary breadwinner’

before this mindset really changes.”

Published in the Journal of Ageing and Health, the new study contrasts with research carried out by the University of Connecticut, which found that being the sole breadwinner is bad for a man’s mental and physical health.

The survey of 9,000 people found that sharing the financial burden with a spouse brings the best benefit to longterm well-being.

Conversely, the study found that women’s mental health benefits from being the only provider, with their overall emotional health and happiness declining as they contributed less to the household.

The US researchers concluded that cultural expectations have left men viewing “breadwinning” as an obligation they must fulfil, while women see it as an achievement. The study followed the progress of more than 3,000 married people aged between 18 and 32 between 1997 and 2011.

They found that during times when men were the sole breadwinner in their family, their psychological well-being scores were an average of 5 per cent lower than years when their partners contributed equally.