‘Absence is tangible for all our family’
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‘I guess I just want everything to be right for her when she comes back here’
every hour of every day. Without them, people would be totally lost.
The staff and volunteers who make up the Missing People charity team are simply very normal, genuine, caring people that you could come and have a cup of tea with. I’m sure that’s part of the secret to the charity’s success.
We often talk about our missing persons ‘community’, or ‘family’, and every Christmas get together for our annual carol service at St Martin-inthe-fields, united in our emotion and hope. We are all cushioned and supported by the presence of each other.
Unless you have experienced what families like ours have, it is impossible to describe the anguish of missing a loved one. I know without the support of so many we would not have made it this far.
We have found that support in many places. A candle still burns for our daughter in the village and Madeleine and all missing children still get mentioned in prayers at our local church – and in many others, I’m sure. With so many things in the world to pray for just now, we are very grateful for this.
At times, the pain of losing our daughter has been almost too much to comprehend.
You don’t know how strong you are until you have no option. Gerry and I are united in our aim of finding Madeleine and our love of our children and making life as good as possible for them. It doesn’t mean there aren’t times when things are emotional, testing or strained. But we’ve got through it so far.
In spite of how hard the festive season has been for our family over the years, our younger children are still really excited about Christmas and that’s lovely to see. I have to remind myself to be cheerful and get into the Christmas spirit with them. I suppose I have learnt over the years that it’s important to have enjoyment yourself, too, and, more than that, it is OK to try. You don’t have to feel guilty.
And if there’s one thing I love, it’s real quality time spent with my children; cuddling up on the couch under a throw and watching a DVD together.
We do a Christmas stocking for them and also one for Madeleine. The presents I buy for her usually have to jump out at me. She would be a teenager now so I try to pick something that would be suitable and enjoyable for her no matter what age she is when she gets to open them. In my head, I guess I just want everything for be right for her when she comes back home.
The loft is filled with the presents I have bought for Madeleine, and her wardrobe, too. Like many families of missing children, we have kept her bedroom exactly the same as it was when she disappeared. The irony is I’m sure she wouldn’t want it like that anymore because it’s bright pink. And, in any case, if Madeleine was to walk through that door the most important thing is she is with us, not what her bedroom is like or anything else for that matter. But for whatever reason, I just can’t bring myself to change it.
The police investigation into Madeleine’s disappearance is still active, thankfully, and while it can be incredibly slow and frustrating, we continue in hope. That is all we can do.
While people gather with their families this weekend and enjoy meals and swap presents together – I would urge them to remember the missing. We must never forget them.
Missing People is a beneficiary of this year’s Telegraph’s Christmas Charity Appeal. To make a donation to this or one of the other charities supported in our appeal, please call 0151 284 1927, visit telegraph.co.uk/charity or see the advert on the left