Clowning around is no laughing matter for some
When the children were little, we booked a clown for a birthday party. The doorbell rang, Himself answered it, and there she was: blue bowler hat with a sunflower sticking out the top, a springy sprout of blonde curls, dotty suit with a ruff around the neck and huge, flat clown shoes that extended several inches into the hall.
Four-year-old boy was horrified by this beaming apparition and started to sob uncontrollably. “Don’t be silly, Tom,” said Himself crossly, showing our guest into the living room. Himself was enchanted by Jenty. Himself, it’s fair to say, was in love.
I seem to remember I spent most of the party trying to coax the birthday boy out from behind the sofa where he was hiding from the entertainer, while Himself filmed her on his video camera and joined in lustily with the songs.
Jenty was absolutely lovely and played a mean banjo, but even the gentlest clown can be frightening for small children. Just as Punch and Judy, that Strindbergian story of domestic violence, was once, bizarrely, considered suitable family entertainment, so clowns have
come to be viewed with suspicion.
According to Clowns International, there are now only around 100 registered clowns in the UK. Kids today prefer Disney characters and pirates.
Personally, I didn’t think the clown experiment had been particularly successful, what with the hysterical child and everything, but Himself disagreed. Jenty became an annual fixture at the kids’ parties and at those of our neighbours. The dads sat there happily on the floor, singing along to Wheels on the Bus and doing all the actions, while their offspring looked on dubiously.
“But I HATE Jenty,” squealed the small boy.
“Yes, but Daddy likes her,” said his big sister.
The threatened extinction of clowns should not be a cause for public mourning. With their scary-sad faces, they were unlikely bringers of mirth. Me, I’m just glad not to see Jenty named as a co-respondent in a divorce petition. Mind you, Himself still gets a dreamy look at the mention of her huge, flat shoes.