The price of my happiness? A snip at just £3.5 million

Say what you like about the Seventies, but I come over quite nostalgic when I think of the simple pleasures that made life worth living: clackers, Kate Bush, the thought of a man from Littlewoods striding up the garden path with a bottle of Asti Spumante and an oversized cheque for £1 million.

Imagine it! That sort of sum represented a life-changing fortune back when the average house cost £12,704 and the average wage was £72 a week.

These days, not so much. Property prices have risen over 47,000 per cent since then. So is it any wonder that a million pounds seems a bit … paltry?

Fantasies – like everything else – have had to keep pace with the cost of living, so my sweet spot is now £3.5 million. You can’t stop progress, however hyperinflationary.

It’s not just me being greedy. According to a new study by the Harvard Business School, no matter how comfortably off we are, we all believe that extra cash will make us happier. When 2,000 millionaires were asked what they needed to be completely content, they invariably cited more money. A quarter of individuals with more than £1.18 million said they would need eleven times more money to be perfectly happy. Even those with a net worth in excess of £7.5 million felt they needed a lot more money to achieve 10 out of 10 on a scale of happiness.

Everybody is chasing the dream; even Marks & Spencer has upgraded its pudding offer to include Billionaire’s Dessert.

Why, if I win on the Premium Bonds, I might even buy one – despite the risk I might not get past the credit checks.